Loving someone means that you care about their happiness. Seeing them happy makes you happy. It’s about lifting each other up! Whether it’s your spouse, your partner, your friend, or another family member caring about them and their happiness is essential to yours.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
~Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash
On New Year’s Eve, My Love and I celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary. As tradition goes, we held an 
NYE celebration after a romantic lunch at Cooper’s Hawk Winery. This year was small as a few people were sick but we ended up having a blast just the same. We learned more about our friends at the table by playing a card game of getting-to-know-you questions. We rang in the new year with champagne and then the singing began! There were only four of us left by then but it was so much fun! After our guests left, my Valentine and I decided to stay up talking until 4 am! What is wrong with us? Sometimes I think we need adult supervision and a bedtime.
It’s hard to believe that this will be our fourth Valentine’s Day as a married couple. We had the best of both worlds by getting married at 8:30 am and having a brunch reception. Some people stayed to hang out at the pool but others left and came back for a New Year’s Eve party/reception. It was so much fun! Of course, looking back there are some things I wish we would have done differently but life is meant to be lived with no regrets, and I don’t want to take away from our perfect day.
If you are married or have been married, you know that marriage is hard. It’s not a fairy tale, it’s not a romance novel and it’s not like it is in the movies. It takes communication, effort, forgiveness, and compromise. Marriage is not perfect. Marriage is complicated.
Somehow, I got lucky. The timing was right when my Prince and I met. Had it been earlier or later when our paths crossed, maybe it wouldn’t have worked out. But for some reason, Sweet Gram broke her hip and led us to Fort Myers that February seven years ago. The stars aligned and for some reason, Fate thought the two of us would make a perfect pair!
Through the ups and downs, we have learned the importance of communication, compromise, and unwavering support for one another. Our journey has taught us that true love is not just about the grand gestures, but also about the small acts of kindness, the sweet moments shared, and the simplicity of being in each other’s presence.
I think that I always wanted the male version of me to be my partner in crime. Is he exactly me? Well, no but we are close. Sometimes that is good and sometimes not so good. He is way more forgiving than I am and like most men (I believe) he says what’s on his mind, we talk about it, and he forgets about it. I, on the other hand, and most women (I believe) tend to hold onto their frustration, wait for ourselves to explode, and then talk about it again and again. Why are we so complicated??
We are fortunate because we don’t have small children. We don’t argue over bedtime or consequences or how much television to let them watch. We both have been very responsible with money so our bills are paid and we have savings for vacation and travel. We don’t have addictions, although we may have a “too much traveling problem”, which is to say we have too many friends and too many social events which leads to too much fun and too many adult beverages. But every marriage has its difficulties. We just have different stressors than those of young adult marriages.
Maybe because we both have been married before we realize life isn’t about keeping score. It’s not about how many times I have done the dishes or cooked the meal. It’s about being a team. Food needs cooked, dishes need to be washed, and counters need to be wiped. Let’s help each other out and get it done. Then we can relax together and do something else we might enjoy. It’s about realizing someone has thrown in the laundry and then the other person putting it in the dryer and folding it. It’s about saying thank you when one partner makes coffee for you in the morning or holds a door open for you. It’s about appreciating what you have. Because we need to remember tomorrow is not guaranteed. Say “I love you”, say “thank you”, and tell your partner they mean the world to you. And say it often.
To celebrate our Fourth Anniversary, we talked about the Highs and Lows of our four years of marriage. My red-headed sister from another mister (aka, my brother-in-law’s significant other) plays this game with the kids at the dinner table. It’s a great way to have my nieces and nephews think and talk about the events of their day. What went well? What was negative? Then discuss it as a family. We decided to review our highs and lows for our four years of marriage. We also looked at our Year in Review and decided what we liked and didn’t like about the past year.
Today is Valentine’s Day. So to my incredible partner, thank you for being my rock, my confidant, and my best friend. Your love has brought so much happiness and fulfillment into my life, and I am forever grateful to have you by my side. Here’s to many more years of love, laughter, adventures, and cherished moments together!
On this February Day of love, I want to express my gratitude and love to all our friends and family who have stood by our side. Your presence in our lives has been a constant source of strength and inspiration, and we are thankful for the love and support you have shown us throughout these four (seven) amazing years. And to those who have drifted out of our lives whether by chance or by choice, I hope you have found peace and happiness in your lives. We miss you and want you to know there is always space in our hearts for more. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Deeds, what you do, and how you act are more important than the words you say. Show your partner how much you love them and care for them in your actions not just in your words.
Love is shown more in deeds than in words.
~Saint Ignatius
Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash
We are all unique in the way we love and express love. We have many different relationships with many different people and there are as many different kinds of love. Let’s take this month of February to express our love for each other.
I think… if it is true that there are as many minds as there are heads, then there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.
~Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina
Photo by Ekaterina Shakharova on Unsplash
We all have choices to make. Maybe we have made some wrong decisions in the past. Maybe we have felt lost and didn’t know where to turn. But remember you can start now and make any change for you. Make a new ending to your life’s story.
“Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”
—Carl Bard
Photo by averie woodard on Unsplash
I posted recently about What we do at Home. This post is about how we eat and what we do on the Road. Because we are Never Home, we tend to eat out more than we would like to. Therefore, we have to be mindful and make good choices. If we happen to be staying at a place with a kitchen we will buy food and cook breakfast at home. Sometimes lunch and dinner too, depending on our situation.
My Love has to eat out more than I do. When he goes on a work trip he has to eat out for all of his meals including the catering on the plane. He has to make a conscious effort to eat as well as he can when he’s gone. When he orders his meals on the plane he will order eggs for breakfast, fish and veggies for dinner, or choose from a few other options. He doesn’t eat the bread or the dessert that comes with the meal. He will get a salad and a fresh fruit when he can. He takes protein bars and nuts with him to snack on. Eating on the road can be hard but good choices can be made.
When we eat out we have to make the effort to choose wisely from the menu. Salads with protein, fish and veggies, omelets with fruit instead of bread. We will split sandwiches sometimes. We will order chicken or hamburgers without the buns. There are little things you can do to make the meals a little bit healthier for you. We don’t order French fries. We don’t order desserts. We rarely order anything deep-fried. But that is us and that is how try to stay in shape with our gypsy lifestyle.
When we fly we almost always bring a bag of food with us. Usually, we have several baggies full of pulled-off chicken breast, homemade turkey/chicken sausages, fruit, nuts, and protein bars. Remember, you can bring your water bottle and refill it after you pass through security. You can also bring food and protein powder in your carry-on luggage. Just make sure it’s not liquid such as hummus or yogurt over the 3-ounce limit. Just know they may pull your bag to check out the food and protein powder, but it’s worth it to take healthy meals on the road.
This is how we do what we do on the road. Our lifestyle isn’t for everyone. We are gypsies and we love it! We also love being in shape and eating as clean as possible. Therefore, as much as we are “on vacation” we rarely eat like we are “on vacation”.
Of course, there is a time and place for everything. Please don’t think that we NEVER eat wings, ice cream, French fries, or pizza. We had pizza for breakfast at my sister-in-law’s over Christmas and took our friends to our favorite ice cream shop The Love Boat. We do enjoy our treats but certainly not every week and sometimes not even every month. I’d say we eat those things a few times a year. And to us we are satisfied.
Anyway, there is always a choice, a good choice, a better choice, and the best choice. For example, let’s say you decide to go to McDonald’s. The choice is a Big Mac and fries. A good choice is a grilled chicken sandwich without the bun or a fruit smoothie and then add your protein powder. A better choice would be a salad with balsamic vinaigrette. And the best choice is don’t go to McDonald’s 🙂
There are always substitutes or omissions. You can always say no bread, you don’t need to order fries, you can have fruit instead of a muffin, and you can add almond milk to your coffee instead of sugary creamers. There are ALWAYS options. You just have to ask for them and sometimes pay for them. The catch is people think eating clean and healthy is expensive. And yes, maybe it is a few dollars more. But let’s think if you don’t make healthy more expensive choices now, you may “pay” for it later when with hospital bills, heart attacks, or loss of a job, etc.
I hope this helps as there is a way to eat healthy while you are on the road and away from home. One other piece of advice is to limit your frequency of fast foods and soft drinks. The only fast food restaurant we go to when we are on the road and don’t have time to sit down and go somewhere local is Chick-fil-A. We get a chicken sandwich or nuggets and no fries and no milkshake. The only drinks we drink are coffee, water, and club soda with our tequila. If we need an energy drink, we drink Celsius or Bang. We believe that bread is one of the most fattening food items. Most American breads are filled with loads of sugar and high fructose corn syrup.
There you have it. Life is all about making choices and these are some of ours.
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Change. It’s inevitable. Things happen. Circumstances change. We change. Our friends change. Our lives change. Yes, it can be scary, but this year let’s work to embrace change and let’s control our reactions to our changing circumstances.
“Change can be scary, but you know what’s scarier? Allowing fear to stop you from growing, evolving, and progressing.”
—Mandy Hale
Photo by Suzanne D. Williams on Unsplash
I hope we all realize whatever life we are living that we can make changes. If you are proud of it and what you have accomplished then continue living your best life. I hope you live with kindness and compassion. I hope you feel happy. If things are difficult and you are not leading the life you wanted then I hope you find the strength and inspiration to start again and become who you want to be. It’s never too late.
“It’s never too late to become who you want to be. I hope you live a life that you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over.”
—F. Scott Fitzgerald
Photo by Andy Beales on Unsplash
A friend asked me how My Rock and I stay in shape when we are Never Home. I have written about our substitutions before but I thought I would share a little bit more of what we do when we are home.
I learned from the best trainer, Bill Lawrence, about how to fuel your body with food. What he preaches works for me and my husband. You can try it and tweak it and make it work for you. If you click on my What We Eat link you will find plenty of recipes of food that we eat and love! A nutritious lifestyle is NOT sustainable IF you don’t like the food you are eating. For us, this is what we do and how we eat. We don’t feel like it’s a diet or that it is hard. It’s just about making choices, and we make the best ones we can wherever we are.
Yes, it may take some time for your body to adjust to not eating as much sugar or seasoning with as much salt, but honestly, after you make a conscious effort to eat better, you will find most of your meals taste better!
When we are home, this is what we do. We like to cook together and eat at home. If we do eat out, we try to make the best choices with the options we have. We rarely order deep-fried food, pasta, wings, or pizza. We usually order salmon and a veggie. Or a salad with protein. (I will write more about what we do when we are on the road this month.) But when we are home, we get up in the morning, have a cup of coffee, and head to the gym. We use MCT oil and Premier or Quest liquid protein as our “creamer”. After we workout, we drink our post-workout protein shake immediately which contains collagen, dextrose, protein, and turmeric. My husband also adds creatine, glutamine, and BCAA’s. It is very important to get protein and carbs into your body after a good workout. During workouts, your muscles are broken down. You need the correct foods to build them back up.
We come home and about an hour later we make breakfast. Usually, we have Ezekiel toast with either a little bit of homemade jelly or nut butter and an egg and egg whites. Sometimes I will make a scramble filled with veggies. Sometimes instead of toast, we have sweet potatoes. Sometimes I will make an egg sandwich on a wrap and use a bit of feta cheese. Other times I will make chicken/turkey apple sausage. As Bill told us this meal should contain a high-energy carb and a good protein to replenish your body within two hours after your workout.
We should eat another high-energy carb and protein meal again another hour later but most of the time we start doing projects, and we don’t eat until lunchtime. Here we usually make a salad. I don’t love lettuce so I use the least amount possible of romaine and spinach. Then we add as many veggies as possible…red onion, tomato, carrots, cucumber, and a healthy fat of avocado, flaxseed, and a touch of dressing made from olive oil. We also add protein to it. Most likely leftover fish or chicken from the night before or we will use canned chicken breast or tuna. Many times we will get a rotisserie chicken from Costco. We take the skin off and peel it. Then we have the meat for the week to snack on, make wraps out of, or use on salads. This is also a great snack to pack along for travel.
In the afternoon, many times my Prince will make a fruit smoothie. We use frozen fruit, a cup of water or almond milk, and a scoop of vanilla protein powder. You could also add a handful of spinach here, chia seeds, or a drizzle of honey.
For dinner, we have a protein and a veggie. Our fish is very basic. We love salmon, sea bass, and tuna steak. We spray or rub with olive oil then sprinkle with Nature Seasons. Sometimes we will add a tiny bit of plant-based butter and a little scoop of minced garlic. If we have it in the house we may sprinkle it with parmesan cheese. The same goes for chicken breast or pork chops. A few times a month we will make steaks on the grill with some grilled asparagus. My Valentine has his special recipe for this marinade with olive oil, Worcestershire, and steak seasoning. You will have to bug him for that recipe. Our veggies are very simple as well. Mostly broccoli and cauliflower with olive oil or avocado oil and sprinkled with Nature Seasons. Spread on a baking sheet and back at 400 for 30 minutes. Simple! And they taste amazing!! I love eating the leftovers cold.
If we are hungry at night we will have a cup of nonfat Greek yogurt with a scoop of Podium Peanut Butter Crunch protein powder. Other snacks we keep in the house around include cottage cheese, carrots, cucumbers, and hummus as well as the flavored pistachios. We also have dark chocolate bark thins in case I get a sweet tooth. If you keep chocolate in the house just make sure you don’t overindulge.
So that is our home routine. If you don’t buy it, you can’t eat it. Be conscious when you go to the grocery store and fill your cart with fresh meat and veggies. Stay away from packaged food items. If your weeks are busy then take a day to food prep so you are ready for your week.
Remember, there is always room for improvement. We have been living this lifestyle for over six years. We are constantly trying to tweak it to meet our needs and to make better choices. Fresh fish and meat are better than canned. Fresh fruit is better than frozen. Email me with any questions. I’d love to help you on your health journey!
If you start buying fresh food you will realize you may go to the store more than once a week. And that is ok. Here is what our grocery list looks like each week:
This is what we do at home. There are several recipes out there and books about eating better in this new year! Check out our list of Favorites! Good luck with making better choices in this new year!
It is hard to take the leap of faith and make changes in your life, whether it be in your marriage, your career, your location, or your day-to-day activities. We get so caught up in routine that we don’t think we can change anything. Or we feel we HAVE to do things a certain way. Although it’s hard and it’s scary, you need to search deep within yourself. What do you want and how can you get there? What conversations do you need to have? What actions do you need to take? You have the power to change the direction of your life.
“Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction.”
―Germany Kent
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