Life is all about making choices. Don’t sit around and wait for things to happen to you. Take charge of your life and make things happen for you.
Don’t wait for things to get easier, simpler, better. Life will always be complicated. Learn to be happy right now. Otherwise, you’ll run out of time.
– unknown
Photo by Levi Meir Clancy on Unsplash
I know I have written about my Prince a few times, but these past few months have been extremely hard for us, and Jeff has been my rock. I don’t know what I would do without him. He is always there to listen, to love me, to tell me I am being too sensitive, and to support me when I need to scream. He picks me up when I am down. He squeezes me when all I need is a huge bear hug. I honestly don’t think I could have found a better match for myself. And I thank Sweet Gram every day for breaking her hip (the first time) which led us to Fort Myers so our path would cross with Jeff’s path.
Since March we have been dealing with a few different family situations. Some with his and some with mine. We have had to make some difficult decisions. We have had to make excessive travel plans. We have had to move things more than we have wanted to. And in doing this Jeff has been my rock. It has been a challenge to our relationship because we are dealing with so many outside factors. We know that all we can control is our attitude, our effort, and our actions. We know within all the chaos, we need to make time for ourselves. We need to put each other first (which at times we both forget) and work on solving problems together. Sometimes we need to consciously stop and check in with each other, which we do.
I think the hardest thing for us is that we both care a lot about our family. I think we both want that family like Blue Bloods where they sit down for their Sunday dinner and have difficult conversations but always support each other. We want everyone there. His family. My family. Even our family-in-law. We always want to be in two places at one time. (Probably more me than him because I have FOMO but….)
Jeff and I are finally realizing that if people want to spend time with us, they will make time for us. They will look for a way to get there to see us whether it’s to drive, fly, or meet us somewhere. Those that care will find a way and will make plans with us. And those that don’t, well we have learned it is their loss, not ours. And we realize that sometimes travel plans are hard to make but we also know where there is a will, there is a way.
Jeff and I are social beings. We love spending time with family and friends. We love being a part of a group and having a bond with others. When others welcome us with open arms, it makes us feel like we are on top of the world. We love spending time with people who love to laugh, who love to give, and who are interested in us and what we are doing or have done in our lives. We love those who love to live life to the fullest.
Although we have had some rough times we also have been very blessed to have some really amazing times with some really wonderful and amazing people. It’s sometimes hard to believe we have such wonderful friends and family we have in our lives. And it seems we just keep meeting more and more wonderful human beings. I cannot thank everyone enough who have welcomed us with open arms. You make our hearts happy!
About four months ago, our small town decided to honor our hometown heroes with military banners that would be hung all around our town. My mom and I decided to donate to the cause. My dad was in the Army and my grandfather was in the Navy. In our travels up and down the east coast, Jeff and I had seen banners in other small towns. His uncle Larry was honored in his hometown of Follansbee, WV. I was so excited our town decided to become a part of this wonderful experience.
The banners started being hung around town in June. We weren’t back in town yet but one of our friends sent us a picture and told us where they were. They looked amazing! Once we got home we drove downtown, and there they were! Gramps and Dad hanging high. Our community leader spent hours on these banners. She was hoping for 50 flags and our town ended up with 217, one even representing the Civil War. How amazing!
Our community leader strategically hung the flags near the family or near the route the families were most likely to take. Ours is located at the bottom of our road. Every time we head into town, we get to see them. I know it’s weird but I usually say, “there they are,” or “hi guys” every time. Eventually, it will probably get old but for now, it makes me extremely happy and proud to see them up there high above the town.
This program seems to be spreading through many towns throughout the United States. The banners honor past and present military members. Families usually donate towards the cost of the banner and the brackets to hold the banner. I think it’s wonderful, and if your town hasn’t started this program I hope they do soon.
Although we don’t know all of the 217 people who are honored in our community, we feel such a sense of pride every time we drive around town. I just love that so many families decided to donate and get their banners hung. It means so much. I think Gramps and Dad would be honored to see their faces flying high above our town.
As you read in Jealousy, according to the book “Compete Every Day” by Jake Thompson we are in control of three things in life…our attitude, our effort, and our emotion. If you want to change your life, it needs to start with you. Commit to the change.
If you’re searching for that one person who will change your life, take a look in the mirror.
-unknown
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash
I have written a few posts (The Dreaded C Word) about my amazing little sister and how we lost her at the young age of 38 after an 18-month battle with an aggressive cancer. I started this blog two years ago on her birthday with one of my favorite posts In the Bathroom with Gram. My blog has changed over the past two years, and I want to thank you for continuing to follow me on my journey as this blog and I evolve.
When you first started following me there were daily inspirations, my Adventures with Gram, Weekly Wednesday Workouts, and Friday Fixins. Then I would write a post or two about Family and Travel.
Last year, on my sister’s birthday, I changed it up a bit and started Weekly Wednesday Words along with Tuesday posts about anything from Gram to Travel to being a Pilot’s Wife. My posts became more sporadic because without having sweet Gram to take care of Jeff and I are Never Home. Last year, I started traveling as much as my husband who flies for a living. Therefore, it has been hard to keep up with my writing. It seems there is very little downtime! I hope you still enjoy my posts as much as I still enjoy writing them when I get the time to write. Please share my blog with your friends and family on your social media, especially those posts you find uplifting or motivational.
So here we are again on August 8th, and today my sister would have been 43. It’s still so hard to believe she’s gone. A lot has changed over the past four and a half years. The kids are now almost 10 and seven. How did that happen?? They are the cutest and most amazing little humans. I am so blessed to be their aunt. We continue to travel to Virginia about every other month to see their sweet faces. They are happy, social, and involved in activities. It is really wonderful to see.
My brother-in-law stays busy as well and also is very happy. I believe my sister is smiling down from Heaven. I know she wants to be here in person to squeeze those little ones and to raise them beside her husband’s side. But since she cannot be here I know more than anything she wants all of us to be happy. She would want her husband to find someone to love and share his life with, she would want me to pursue my dreams of seeing the world with the amazing husband I found, she would want her mother to be happy doing activities she loves and find friendships she enjoys (and maybe even a significant other to share her life with), and she would want her children to run around, be active, explore their passions, and express gratitude and kindness towards all. She would want wonderful women in their lives to love them, to teach them, and to show them how important it is for life to be lived.
We all still miss my sister every day. We miss her smile and her sweet demeanor. She was one of a kind. My husband and I started a scholarship for her at our hometown high school. The young woman that we picked this year wrote a wonderful essay on why she should receive it. Then she wrote us a lovely thank you card with these words.
I am so honored to have received the Scholarship. I am so thankful for the generosity of you both and the support to pursue my dreams. I am beyond proud to resemble her character even in the slightest; I’ve heard amazing things about her. My gratitude is endless, thank you.
It meant the world to me that she took the time to apply for the essay and then write us such a sweet note. It brings tears to my eyes. This is what I want the community of Cambridge Springs to remember about my sister. Since she is not here I feel it is up to me to tell stories of how amazing of a person she was. I want everyone who didn’t have a chance to meet her to know her and love her as much as we all do. I want her memory to live on. I want everyone to remember her name. And when they see it, I want them to think of her and smile.
Attitude is everything. If you believe in the positive then usually the positive will happen. Start every day with a smile.
If we have the attitude that it is going to be a great day, it usually is.
-Catherine Pulsifer
Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash
Sometimes I think we take for granted the beauty of those things around us. Sometimes we don’t see the beauty in it at all. I hope we can take a moment every day to treasure the beautiful world and people around us.
Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see.
— Confucius
Photo by Liam Pozz on Unsplash
Life is short. Who do you want to be? How do you want to live? Once you decide, take action to be that person.
The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
Photo by Amanda Jones on Unsplash
Rather than sit idly by in fear, find your passion and strive for it.
I would rather die of passion than of boredom.
— Vincent van Gogh
Photo by Randalyn Hill on Unsplash
Jealousy is a dangerous trait. According to Wikipedia, jealousy is resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another’s success or advantage itself. Why are we jealous of others instead of being happy for that person’s success and happiness? Although I think we all feel a little jealousy at times, that jealousy needs to be in check. When you were younger maybe somebody got an A on the test and you didn’t. Maybe somebody got a car when they were 16 and you didn’t. Maybe someone got to take a fabulous vacation and you didn’t. Yes, we all experience a little bit of jealousy but usually, it passes or we use it to better ourselves through competition. We study harder to get an A. We work harder to get the car or take a vacation. The problem occurs when that jealousy takes a hold of your life and you can’t be happy with anything that you have and you feel hatred towards people who have worked hard to get what they have.
Jealousy though can destroy relationships. Jealousy can destroy someone’s own self-worth. It can lead to self-doubt and negative talk. None of this is healthy.
It is so hard. I think we are taught at a young age to compare ourselves to others. And if we don’t have what others have then we feel bad about ourselves. Why do we do this?? Does anyone really care what kind of car I drive? And if so, why? It’s a car.
I started reading a book called “Compete Every Day” by Jake Thompson. He states, “We have control of only three things in life: our effort, our attitude, and our emotions.” He goes on to say that it is unsustainable to constantly compare yourself to others. You cannot control them. Comparison is a never-ending rat race. This type of mindset is exhausting.
We need to learn to compete with ourselves. We need to be better today than we were yesterday. Your greatest competition should be with yourself.
When you compare yourself to others you are measuring your worth against what you perceive others to be. Quit sitting around waiting for things to happen to you and choose to take action. Decide what you want to do and who you want to be.
On page 17 he breaks it down by saying that “the problem with comparison is that there’s always someone doing better than we are and that there’s always someone doing it worse than we are. Instead of celebrating the progress we’ve made, we’re miserable, because we still aren’t to the level of someone else. We blame our lack of success on “big risks, lack of experience, bad bosses, snooze alarms, and crazy exes” when if you really look on the inside we need to work on “our fears, our doubts, our self-limiting beliefs, our bad habits, and our toxic relationships.”
Instead of competing with others (who you can’t control) compete with yourself. What do you want to do better than you did before? What goals do you want to accomplish? What steps do you need to take to get there?
At the end of each chapter, he has takeaways. I love this one and need to remember it every day.
“No matter what, you always control your attitude, your effort, and your actions. Blaming someone else when you falter with these three is simply an excuse and a lack of personal responsibility. Own what you control, and do your best every day.”
It’s so simple, yet so complicated. We as humans are full of excuses. We want to blame everyone but ourselves. We need to take responsibility for the careers we chose, the choices we’ve made, and the vacations we’ve decided to take.
In another chapter, he talks about forming your team. You want to surround yourself with people who want to grow and succeed and who want YOU to grow and succeed. We need to rid our lives of those toxic people who are filled with negativity. We want relationships that encourage us, challenge us, and remind us of who we say we want to be. We need to set a high standard for ourselves and live up to that standard. Life is hard enough. We don’t need to be in a circle of friends who pull us down. We need to surround ourselves with people who are happy for the successes we have, happy for the vacations we get to take, and happy for the love we’ve found in life. We don’t need people in our circle who are upset that we smile, upset that we get to go somewhere they have never been, or upset because we are happy and successful.
So, try to move past the jealousy. Take responsibility for your actions and your choices. Praise and be happy for those who are successful and compete with yourself to get 1% better every day!
Photo by Artem Beliaikin on Unsplash