“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.”
– Michael Jordan
You can only have one thought in your head at any given time. Make it a positive one. And make sure you start your day with one.
– Dr. Greg Wells, “The Ripple Effect”
So who am I? How did I get here? And why am I writing a blog?
WHO AM I?
I am from a tiny town in Northwestern Pennsylvania. I went to a small college and graduated with an education degree. Then, I moved to California to teach first grade. Six months later, I moved to Richmond, Virginia. There, I taught special education for eight years, earned my Master’s degree, and became a special education coordinator for another eight years.
Something happened in 2015, and I just wanted out. I needed a change of pace. A friend recommended the Greenheart Travel program, and I decided to go to Thailand to teach English as a second language. I was super excited. I had a friend to travel with and tons of opportunities to meet others.
After months of debate and discussion, I left a 16-year career in education where I was making $70,000 a year and had 14 weeks of sick time built up. I wasn’t sure how things would turn out, and many people thought I was making the wrong decision, but I decided to take a leap of faith and jump. Looking back now, I can’t be more thankful that I did.
In the fall of 2015, I left for what would end up being an amazing adventure. Because I am a Travel Junkie, I contacted friends I had around Europe and visited eight countries along the way (Germany, Switzerland, Finland, Sweden, Italy, The Netherlands, France, and Spain).
Then, my friend Katherine and I headed to Thailand where we would end up spending two months working with children and exploring the Thai culture. I remember when we arrived in Bangkok, we met about 30 people who were also there for training. We had a couple of days in Bangkok where we visited Thai markets, ate some interesting foods, and went to a Thai cooking class. Then, we headed to Hua Hin where we had classroom activities. We learned a bit of the Thai language and that was my first introduction to Sabai Sabai [pron. suh-BYE suh-BYE] which means “no worries, no problem, just relax”. After three weeks of training, Katherine and I were placed at an international school. We were only there for three weeks and then it was Christmas break and we had a month off, so we traveled around Thailand a bit and then I decided to go home to Virginia for Christmas.
HOW DID I GET HERE?
It was Christmas 2015. Our whole family was together including Grandma and Grandpa. We had a great time making pierogies as per our (Polish) Christmas tradition but, I also made mango sticky rice, which was my new favorite dessert from Thailand. We had a wonderful time until Christmas evening when my 90-year-old grandfather ended up in the hospital. He had fluid built up around his lungs and was having trouble breathing. He was in the hospital for several days. I wasn’t sure what would happen, but I felt I needed to stay in the United States and be with him and my family. Therefore, I canceled my trip back to Thailand. After a week in the hospital, they sent him to rehab.
About a month later, in February 2016, our family was at a loss. He wasn’t getting better, he seemed to have lost all hope and wasn’t trying. After several discussions about different options, it was decided I would drive my grandparents home to Pennsylvania. We arranged for Hospice care so that I would have some help. Even though physically he had deteriorated, mentally, he had every desire in the world to go to Fort Myers, Florida to their winter condo like they did every year, but Gram won out, and we headed north.
He was a large, stubborn man and he was very upset that we went north instead of south, but we made it. He was very weak and couldn’t even walk to the door. His heart failure won out because we weren’t even home a week and the good Lord called him to heaven. My grandparents were together just two weeks shy of 66 years. What an inspiring marriage!
Since I didn’t have a job and my house in Virginia was rented for the year, I decided to stay and take care of my grandmother. She needed company, and I needed a place to live. I didn’t know if my grandmother would live for two days, two weeks, or two months without my grandfather, but I decided to stay.
WHY AM I WRITING THIS BLOG?
This blog is a collection of stories from September 2015 to the present day. It is meant to make you want to live life to the fullest, laugh often, love with your whole heart, and constantly learn to be better. It is to share the stories of my Adventures with Gram and my family. It is to show you to never give up on your dreams by sharing my travel adventures, my fitness journey, and my journey in finding love. Hopefully, some of my stories will inspire you to take chances that you’re too scared to take right now. Hopefully, it will inspire you to start a fitness journey of your own. It may inspire you to go see your grandparents or parents. Whatever it is, I hope this blog at least warms your heart and makes you smile.
Before any workout, you should try to do a quick warm-up. In this warm-up, you do each movement for about 30 seconds. Go through it once and if you feel you need more then repeat it. The movements are:
- Frankensteins (kick leg straight out in front of you)
- High knees
- Pull knee to your chest for stretch
- Butt kicks
- Hamstring stretch
- Inchworm
- Lunges
- Cossack squats side to side
- Small arm circles (15 seconds forward, 15 seconds backwards)
- Medium arm circles (15 seconds forward, 15 seconds backwards)
- Big arm circles (15 seconds forward, 15 seconds backwards)
When I quit my job in the fall of 2015, I wasn’t sure where life would lead. I just knew I wasn’t happy, and I wanted to see the world. I also wanted to find love, and I wasn’t having any success in Virginia. As you read in the post “How Did I Get Here?“, I left a wonderful career in education to go to Thailand to teach English. I came back. I didn’t have a job and my house was rented.
Those life changes led me back to my hometown. It was winter. It was snowing. It was cold, but I decided to make the best of it. Gram and I made fires in the fireplace, and we didn’t really have anywhere to go so winter wasn’t too bad 🙂
As time went on, I hung out with old friends from high school. Many of their children were in high school so, I went to local sporting events to watch them. Every time I went to a game, it was like a high school reunion! It was great to see everyone and their mini me’s.
Finally, spring arrived and my high school friends talked me into helping coach my old high school softball team. Also, to fill some time because Gram was fairly self-sufficient, I started working at J’s Ice Cream and Hot Dog Shop where I learned to make ice cream cones. It is definitely a lot harder than it looks! I felt comfortable leaving her for half the day because she would get herself up and dressed, read the paper, and make breakfast. I would work and then pick her up for the softball games. She loved seeing me coach and watching the girls play.
Spring was long, cold, and muddy but, we made it. Finally, summertime. Long, warm summer days and cool summer nights came upon us which was great for sleeping with no air conditioning. That summer, I hung out with one of my high school friend’s daughter. I couldn’t believe she was 21. We had the best time. I introduced her to some amazing 80’s music, and she taught me the names of some of the back roads in town that I didn’t know.
That fall, I worked with her at a chiropractor’s office. When we weren’t working, we were out drinking a lot together, and I was drinking a lot on my own. I decided I needed a detox. I set the goal to quit drinking for a month. With the support of family and friends, I made it 34 days without one drink!!
That fall, someone suggested that I try CrossFit Meadville. I was doing workouts at home, but I really missed going to a gym. After the first week, I was hooked! I was sore, tired, and exhausted, but the workouts were awesome and always different. I had a great trainer and the support of other CrossFitters was motivating. I was easy to coach and eager to learn. Bill, the owner of the gym, talked a lot about nutrition and eating right, and I was interested in making those changes. He definitely inspired me to challenge myself.
That year was full of life changes. I went from being a professional educator to becoming a caregiver with minimum wage part-time jobs. I moved from a big city back to my small rural home town. My social life went from hanging out with a variety of friends to hanging out with Gram, but we had some great adventures. We went to Pirates games. We traveled a lot to Virginia to see family. We ate a lot of ice cream. We took a lot of Sunday drives.
She went to bingo every other Monday, which gave me a night free of responsibility. At first, she could get herself ready and would proudly pack her “bingo bag” with her markers and lucky charms. As time went on, she needed a little extra help but, she still was determined to go. Those Mondays off were very important to me as a caregiver, and I cherished the time off. Even though I felt a little lost, I knew I was on the right journey. Then one rainy, chilly night in December 2016 as she was leaving bingo, she fell and broke her hip. And once again, new life changes were upon me.
I have had over four years of Adventures with Gram. When I started taking care of her in February 2016 after my grandfather passed, I didn’t know how long she would last. I also didn’t know that 90% of our conversations would take place in the bathroom! But here I am. Another Friday night …in the bathroom with Gram.
My husband and our friends are outside sitting by the pool enjoying a beautiful night, good friendship, and some adult beverages. And here I am …in the bathroom with Gram. And it’s fine. But then I ask myself “is it?” Is this where I am supposed to be? Is there where I pictured myself being …in the bathroom with Gram? Of course not, but this is where I am and this is my journey. Sabai Sabai
In the bathroom with Gram is where I am more often than I imagined. Sometimes I get down about missing certain things because I am in the bathroom with Gram, but then I try to remind myself it’s kind of like being a mom and having to put the kiddos to bed. You may miss out on what’s going on in your living room, but sometimes you have amazing, special experiences on your own when you are tucking them in tight.
Some of my favorite conversations are in the bathroom with Gram. A lot of times she repeats the same phrases. Most of the time I hear “take me behind the barn and shoot me” or “I look like death warmed over… two times” or “starość nie jest radością” which is Polish and she tells me it means “it’s hell getting old”. The formal translation means “old age is not joy”. She will talk about how she misses my grandpa. She talks about how she’s a burden and to just put her away. She tells me not to let her sit around and eat candy all day. She is really funny sometimes especially when she cracks herself up. She talks about how I am spending too much time with her and how I need to get back out to my husband. I am thankful that she is considerate of me. Of course, it’s not like she is setting any speed records but she tries. So, I spend my time in the bathroom with Gram, enjoying our conversations and hoping my ice doesn’t melt by the time I get back to my drink.
Although I have never seen it, there is a movie called “Yes Man” starring Jim Carrey (2008). There have been a few people over the years who have made reference to it saying I was a Yes Woman just like Carl in the movie because I would always say Yes. Anyone who knows me, knows I have a hard time saying no, and I do not like missing out on things. Therefore, I say Yes to almost everything. Because I have said Yes to weddings, birthdays, and family occasions, I have seen beautiful parts of the United States and the world. I must say I have really enjoyed most of the experiences, and I am glad I am a Yes Woman!
I’ve always loved traveling. Being a teacher allowed me to have a lot of time off, but not necessarily a lot of money to do the traveling. So, I chose to give up a lot of “stuff” that way I could say Yes to the next big trip. If traveling is your passion, then you do what you have to do to make it happen.
Because I am a Yes Woman, I have had amazing road trips across the United States and beautiful Mexican, European and Caribbean vacations for which I am so grateful. As you read this blog, you will see many fun Adventures with Gram and some great trips without her.
Being a Yes Woman sometimes can get you in trouble. At times saying Yes can be overwhelming, tiring, and stressful, I am learning that I don’t have to say Yes to everything. I am learning to value my time and to evaluate opportunities before saying Yes. I am learning to say no and to have time to recover and relax. I am getting better at it 🙂 Although it is overwhelming, tiring, and exhausting, saying Yes to becoming Gram’s caregiver has been one of the most inspiring and amazing experiences I have had.
Being a caregiver has thrown a curve ball into my traveling game, but I do what I have to do to continue to make it happen. I am also beyond blessed that I found a Yes Man who loves traveling and loves Gram as much as I do. One of the best things I have said Yes to was to his proposal made to me in Chicago on his 50th birthday. So far, we have been to six countries and 15 states together. Whatever arrangements need to be made to continue our adventures, we make them. As caregivers, we know in order to be the best caregivers, it is extremely important to take care of ourselves first. We know that getting a break makes all the difference in the world.
Over the past few years, I have learned that life changes on a dime so make the best of every day. The thing is, life is short and we only get one shot. Take the time off and take that trip with your friends or loved ones. Having and making memories is so much better than having “stuff”. So, take a chance and be a Yes WoMan!
One of our favorite books is by Dr. Greg Wells, called “The Ripple Effect…Sleep Better, Eat Better, Move Better, Think Better.” Although we have been eating relatively healthy for years, we continue to learn how to eat better and move better.
As you read in Life Changes, I started CrossFit in October 2016. At CrossFit Meadville, I learned the importance of food as fuel. I learned how to eat to build muscle and lose weight. I went from 129 pounds and 19.6% body fat to 119 and 15.8% body fat in just 16 weeks. Although my body got smaller, I looked bigger because I was leaner.
My husband and I met while we were at a Boot Camp at a CrossFit gym in Fort Myers. Together, we enjoy working out and eating better in order to feel better. It is more of our lifestyle than a “diet”. We realize that most of the work for keeping our bodies fit is done in the kitchen. Although I am not a fitness or nutrition expert, I do enjoy learning how to be healthy and many people have asked me what I eat. Therefore, I am creating this Fitness and Nutrition corner to share the meals we eat and some of the movements we do.
The workouts are meant to be quick (15 minutes or so) and can be modified in reps or weight. Maybe these workouts will motivate you to start a fitness journey. I love CrossFit but you may love running or high-intensity workouts. The important thing is finding something you enjoy doing. It can be walking, running, weightlifting, biking, etc. Find something you can get passionate about and do it often. I will post Weekly Wednesday Workouts. I will also post videos on YouTube that show you each movement and some modifications you can make.
Getting your body moving is key to a happy and healthy lifestyle. According to Dr. Greg Wells, in order to eat better and move better, going for a walk outside for just 15 minutes a day can do wonders for your mind, body, and spirit. But if you really want to make a difference in your overall health, you may want to look at what you are putting into your body. Eating fried and processed food can lead to bloating and lack of motivation. We believe in eating a lean protein, a healthy fat, and the right carb at each meal. We try to eat at home as much as possible, and we try to make good decisions when we are out to eat. We strive for making those good decisions 85-90% of the time.
We learned you have a “window” after you workout of about three hours. Within that window, you want to eat high energy carbs like rice, pasta, quinoa, bananas, oatmeal, potatoes, and bread. Your body needs these carbs to refuel. The rest of the day, you will want to focus on the low energy carbs like veggies and fruit. Lean proteins include turkey, chicken, fish, bison, plain non-fat Greek yogurt, low-fat cottage cheese, tofu, lean beef, seafood, and eggs/egg whites. You want to look for meats with a fat content of 10 grams or less. Healthy fats include avocados, olive oil, flaxseed oil, nuts, nut butters, ground flaxseed, and dark chocolate. Salmon and tuna can be both your fat and protein.
It may sound a bit complicated but as you sit down for each meal just ask yourself, “Do I have a lean protein? Do I have a healthy fat? Do I have a carb?” For example, a meal for dinner would be salmon and 2-3 cups of broccoli and cauliflower made with olive oil and sprinkled with seasoning and ground flaxseed. There are tons of ideas out there. A lot of times, we just get on Ecosia (a search engine you can add to Safari or Chrome…for every search it plants trees!) and find a recipe we want to try.
The meals I post on Friday Fixin’s are going to be pretty easy and simple. The key is to enjoy the food you eat and to eat a variety of food. We buy the food we want to eat. If you buy chips, donuts, and other snacks, then that is what you will eat. Yes, those foods are delicious but, maybe they shouldn’t be staples in your pantry. We buy wild-caught fish and seafood. We use Nature Seasons on almost everything. Just remember you won’t be able to keep up with healthy eating if you are eating the same thing over and over and it tastes like cardboard 🙂 So, mix it up! This isn’t a “recipe” blog so the pictures of the meals aren’t going to win any award presentations, but I will do my best to help you with measurements and proportions. A lot of times, we just make it up and throw what we have in the refrigerator into our meals.
Needless to say, I hope you enjoy this Fitness and Nutrition corner, and I hope we can learn from each other to eat better, move better, and get 1% better every day as Dr. Wells suggests.
“Magic is believing in yourself. If you can make that happen, you can make anything happen.”
– Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe