believe in yourself Archives - Page 24 of 27 - Inspired & Strong

It seems every January, people make resolutions that they don’t keep. They think it’s a new year, it should be a new me. Instead of being realistic they go for the gold and end up quitting before they even get started. This year, make your resolution mindful and realistic. Reread the post Eat Better and Move Better and focus on becoming 1% better every day. What baby steps can you make to meet your goal? The more steps you take and the more progress you see the more likely you will be to keep going.

It’s hard because, after the holidays and all of the parties and gatherings, you want to be a new you in the new year. But try to evaluate where you are now and where you want to go. Then be realistic about the amount of work you will need to put in. I am not trying to discourage you. I just want you to be honest with yourself. Whatever your new year goals are…what does it take to get there?

Do you want to lose weight? Gain muscle? Run a race? Quit drinking? Quit smoking? Eat at home more often? Eat less fast food? Travel more? Do a Spartan Race or a mud run? Hike a mountain? Ride a bike? Whatever you decide, write it down, and determine your short-term goals. Remember the end goals are like marathons, not sprints. You are not going to lose 10 pounds in 10 days. It takes time. So start small. Start with two pounds a month and by next year the new you will be 24 pounds lighter! And next year, you can continue and soon you are down 48 pounds, and you can keep it off because you have changed your lifestyle and not gone on some fad diet.

I talk a lot in this blog about how we eat and how we move. I first learned to eat healthily at Bill Lawrencen’s Personal Fitness in Meadville, PA. If you are in the area, go now, and start Dream Team. You won’t be sorry. He gets some serious results. You can also participate virtually. Check out the website. To this day, Jeff and I continue eating a lean protein, the right carb, and a healthy fat at every meal. When we eat out, we make as healthy of a choice as we can, and usually, we order fish or lean meat and veggies.

If your goal is to travel more then decide how often do you want to go? How much do you want to spend on each trip? Then make it happen. Do a little each week or month to get you there. Look for deals on airlines. Look at the low-cost carriers. Try to pack minimally and don’t pay for a seat or luggage. There are many ways to travel inexpensively. Also, look at credit cards that give you miles.

Whatever your goals, it’s a new year for a new you. Start small and take baby steps. Jeff and I had our two-year wedding anniversary on December 31st. One of our new year’s commitments to each other is that every month we will do one of the Five Love Languages. We did them the first two years of our relationship but haven’t made a conscious effort on them for the last two years. Each month we will pick a language and make a day of it. To find out your love language and that of your partner or even a family member, click here.

Whatever your goals, I wish you a safe, happy, and healthy new year and new you! Stay strong and be inspired each and every day!

Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash

In Inspiration

Moved to Act

November 29, 2021 No Comments

“If you show people the problems, and you show people the solutions, they will be moved to act.”

– Bill Gates

Photo by Mick Haupt on Unsplash

In Family

Let Go

November 2, 2021 No Comments

Sometimes I think we forget that we have no control over other people. We only have control over our own thoughts and reactions to situations. We can only do our best with the information we have and the situation we are in. We can’t make other people do something or stop doing something. We can offer advice, we can give our opinion, we can get mad, we can get upset, but sometimes we need to just let go.

We all have our own minds and information and all we can do is what is best or what we think is best for us at the time. For example, in 2015, although I had a great job, great friends, and lived in a great town. I decided what was best for me is to let go, take a leap of faith, quit my job, and move. So many people don’t take that chance and feel they have to stay in that job or that town for their family even if they are miserable.

What so many people don’t see is that staying in the same situation and being miserable makes everyone around you miserable. Negativity breeds negativity. People want to smile. They want to be happy. So let go of the negativity and be happy. See the positives of the situation. Change what you can but let go of the things you can’t.

I forget this sometimes, and I want to change what people are doing or what they are thinking, or how they are reacting to a situation. And in the end, I need to let it go. I need to realize I am responsible for myself. I am responsible for my happiness. I am responsible for my actions. And when I do that and let go, I am happy.

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

In Family

Timing

October 5, 2021 3 Comments

I had the pleasure of spending a beautiful fall day with my mother a couple of weeks ago. We went to Buffalo to our favorite jewelry store. The owner, Gary Grelick, played basketball for my Grandpa and has been a family friend for as long as I can remember. My grandfather loved investing in jewelry for my grandmother and used Bomi Jewelers for all his jewelry needs. Gram didn’t have an engagement ring so I believe my grandfather tried to make up for it later in her life. I guess it’s all about the timing.

Gary has made beautiful and unique pieces for our family over the years. I remember as a child going to the store and just loved being around all those gems. I was in awe looking through all the amazing jewelry cases. No wonder I love diamonds so much 🙂 (plus they happen to be my birthstone!).

This time my mother and I took a road trip up to New York. Mom decided this summer to take off her wedding band and engagement ring. It has been nine years since my dad passed and this summer she decided the timing was right. She wanted Gary to make her something special to wear in place of her band. After a couple of hours of deliberating and trying different pieces, mom decided on a beautiful piece that will incorporate all of our family’s birthstones as well as her engagement ring. It is going to be absolutely gorgeous. I cannot wait for her to get it!

After our trip to the jewelry store, we went to Niagara Falls. We had lunch in our car, went to the Casino for about an hour, and walked around the park. I did win $11. It was a perfect autumn afternoon. Then it was time to leave. I left my mom with her cousins for a fun-filled fall weekend in upstate New York, and I got into my car to head home to PA.

On my way home, I started thinking about my parents and the timing of it all. They knew each other in high school and started dating in their 20’s. They then married and had my sister and me. Their marriage was not perfect, they had many trials and tribulations, but they were making it, and they loved each other.

At age 51, my dad was diagnosed with cancer. Lung cancer. Stage 3. It was wrapped around his pulmonary artery, and they were not going to operate. He went through months of radiation and chemo and things were looking stable. He ended up fighting lung cancer on and off for the next nine years. At age 60, the fight was too much, his time on Earth was over, and God took him to Heaven to do other work.

The reason I am telling you all of this is because when he was fighting I was in my late 20’s and early 30’s. I knew he wasn’t “old” but he was my Dad. I guess I never really thought about his AGE or the timing of it. On that car ride home, I thought back to when his battle began, and I realized my husband is the same age as my dad was when his battle began. It has put into perspective how YOUNG my dad was when this all started. And it put into perspective how YOUNG my mom was when he passed and how young she still is.

It has been nine years. I am not sure if my mom has thought about dating. If my mom would have started seeing someone right after my dad passed, maybe I would have been hurt or upset. But now it’s been nine years. I know she loved my dad, and they had a great life together. But now I am wondering when is the time right to move on?

I know it’s different for everyone. Some people move from one relationship to another right after a partner’s death, a divorce, or a break-up. Some people take years to find someone they want to spend time with again. We are all unique. We all deal with death, divorce, and break-ups differently. There is no book to follow and no timeline to adhere to.

It is very difficult to be the person on the outside. Sometimes you want your friend or loved to move on. You want them to “just get over it”. Or sometimes we think “how can they start dating again ALREADY?”. It’s way too soon. The timing is different for everyone in every situation. We can’t judge. We need to be supportive and encouraging. We need to remember we aren’t in the same situation. We don’t know what we would do.

I really would like my mom to find someone to spend the rest of her years with. Now whether she wants someone or not, I don’t know. She has her grandchildren, her family, and her friends. But I pray that God will put someone in her life to travel with, to explore the world with, to experience the grandchildren with. I hope that maybe the timing is right. Maybe taking her ring off is the first step in putting herself out there and being open to the idea of sharing her life with someone.

As I drove home I thought of my family and the losses we have endured. I remember one Christmas we were driving around town looking at the Christmas lights. At that point, everyone in the car was “single”. My brother-in-law just lost my sister, Gram had lost Gramps, and Mom had lost Dad. I was the only one in the car who had decided to divorce my ex-husband and who was dating My Prince 10 years later. All of the others did not choose the path they were on. And it still breaks my heart that they have lost their loves and that half of my family is gone.

So the question remains, when is the time right to move on? One week, one month, one year, five years, 10 years? There is so much to process when you lose someone close to you. Of course, I believe finding the right therapist and talking it out can really help. I also think surrounding yourself with positive, happy people helps. As hard as it is to accept, the loved one isn’t coming back.

So, the question becomes when is the timing right? What do I want? Do I want to do life by myself with friends and family? Do I want a partner to go to dinner with and share the day’s events with before bedtime? Of course, it is an individual decision and finding the right partner to spend time with isn’t always easy.

But remember, life is short. Whatever path you choose, make it a happy one, and count the blessings you do have. Enjoy the time you have left on Earth doing what you love, doing what inspires you, and doing things to inspire others.

In Family

Campfire

September 28, 2021 No Comments

This past weekend we had lifelong friends over to our new house (Gram’s House) for dinner and a campfire. We bought a fire ring and put it towards the back of our property. Behind the house is wooded, so even though we are within town limits we are allowed to have a contained campfire ring in the backyard. I was so excited.

We had delicious chicken shish kabobs and our friends brought amazing salads, appetizers, and a zucchini bake. We had a fantastic dinner on our back deck at the large picnic table that was handed down from Jeff’s grandfather to his Aunt Sandy to us. Then we proceeded to the backyard to hang out around the campfire.

I felt like I was in the country around our campfire even though we were right in our backyard. I sat in the chair facing the woods. With the moonlight and the stars above, it was so beautiful and peaceful. There were nine of us, and we had the best time. Most of those around the campfire I have known since elementary school. Two of them were my sister’s best friends. It was so nice to be around people who know me and have known my whole family over the years. There is nothing like lifelong friendships.

Since we have all known each other forever the conversation was easy. We talked about everything from how terrible some of us sing, to being single and independent, to finding our Prince and having kids to how hard marriage can be, to peeing behind trees to concerts we’ve attended. The stories we all told had everyone laughing out loud. My stomach hurt the next day from all the fun.

Even though my sister isn’t here to partake in the campfire and to share the memories of Gram’s House and growing up in our little town, it made me feel close to her having two of her closest friends there with us. Jeff only knew my sister for about six months before she passed. Having her friends around gives me hope that over the years as stories are told he and my other newer friends will get to know her better and cherish her memory just like I do.

Jeff and I have two very different homes. Our winter home in Florida is Spanish Colonial-style with tile floors and big glass patio windows overlooking the pool and the canal. The floorplan is open concept and renovations have been done to all of the rooms over the past 20 years. Our summer home is half the size of the Florida home and in a town that is about 1/20th the size of our winter hometown. We live in a rural area but on the edge of “town”. Our back deck looks out into the woods which is beautiful. The only updates that have been done to Gram’s House are the ones that have been completed in the past five years. We still have a lot of work to do.

Even though the two homes are very different they are the same in that we love having people over to fill our homes with laughter and to make memories. We are so blessed in both states that we have amazing friends and family that join us in this endeavor. I feel like this poster sums it up.

In the end, I am so glad that we made the decision to buy Gram’s House. I love it and am beyond grateful for the people that surround me. I look forward to all of the new memories we can make in Gram’s House. I know she is smiling down and excited for us, too.

In Pilot's Wife

My Music

September 21, 2021 1 Comment

Many people, whether they are single or in a relationship love watching movies, television series, and Netflix. And maybe it’s because Jeff and I barely sit still for one minute let alone for an hour or two to watch TV, but the first thing we do when we walk in the house is turn on the music. In Florida, we use our phones to turn on our Sonos system. In Pennsylvania, we either turn on the Sonos Move that we bring with us or Gramps‘ Bose radio. Either way, music is on ALL THE TIME.

I was trying to think of something to blog about, and I thought why not talk about music. I can learn about your favorite songs and maybe you can listen to a few of mine. I love discovering new music so I hope to hear from many of you about some new (or old) artists that I may not know about and may soon love, too.

My Favorite Music as a Child

I was born in 1976. My parents loved music as well and had it on throughout the weekends. We had a stereo and a record player. In my dad’s Bronco, we also had an 8 track player! Some of you youngsters may have to Google all of that 🙂 but we had a good collection of music. We joined BMG records and would get 12 records or audiocassettes and later CD’s for the price of one. It was the best way to get new music delivered right to your doorstep.

My childhood was filled with the sweet sounds of bands like the Eagles, Michael Jackson, Prince, Kenny Rogers, and Credence Clearwater Revival to name a few. My mom loved Air Supply and REO Speedwagon, and I flash right back to my childhood when I hear any of the above artists. One evening at Gram’s House, we were listening to Brown Eyed Girl on the tape player. My sister and I must have hit play and rewind 100 times trying to learn all the words as my parents would sign along and tell us what was coming up.

My First CD

As I got a little older, the music industry came out with CDs. My first CD was the Boomerang Soundtrack. I had a collection of over 100 CDs by the time I went to college (which got stolen from my car BTW). I had everything from Garth Brooks to Shai to Sophie B. Hawkins to Janet Jackson.

My Favorite Song to Sing with my Best Friend

I have had the same best friend since 7th grade. We played softball and basketball together and developed an everlasting friendship to this day. She was a year younger than me and she won’t let me forget it now! But we would ride around the country roads of our town and learn the words to various songs. Our most favorite that we still send pictures of when it’s playing on Sirius XM is Stay by Lisa Loeb. We still know every word because we kept hitting rewind and signing each line until we KNEW every word. We also love Sophie B. Hawkins and the song Did We Not Choose Each Other. Of course, we also rode all over Edinboro with my portable CD player blasting Janet Jackson’s Janet CD. Other high school memories include our softball team being on the bus with the baseball team and every few weeks after a good win we would all sing Friends in Low Places on the way home. I also loved The Jets Got a Crush on You. And my high school girlfriends will still play it for me when we go out together.

My Favorite Song to Sing

If you know me or have been reading this blog for a while then you know my favorite song to sing after a few beers is Dreams by Van Halen. Jeff’s mom had the pleasure of listening to me sing a few weeks ago. Although she laughed and laughed, I am afraid I may have scared her away. Hopefully she comes back for another performance very soon.

My Favorite Artist to Sing that Sounds a Liiiiiitttttttllle Better than Sammy But Not Much

My roommate from college brought a double-disc live CD back from a concert she went to one summer. The artist was Ani Difranco and it was her Living In Clip CD. Ani opened for Bob Dylan that summer of 97 in Boston. Once D brought her into our lives, we couldn’t stop listening to her. We listened to those two CDs over and over again. I can still turn on almost any Ani song and know the words. I love Gravel, Little Plastic Castles, Angry Anymore. Shameless and Buildings and Bridges. My husband says I sound much better singing any Ani song rather than any Van Halen song. So I am going with it.

Other CDs that I wore out in college were TLC’s CrazySexyCool, Sheryl Crow’s Tuesday Night Music Club, and Dave Matthews Band Before These Crowded Streets. Our favorite concert to go to in college was DMB. So much fun!

Music When You are in Love

I believe these songs change over time as you and your partner grow into different stages of your relationship and one song may work for one relationship but if that relationship ends another song fills the void when a new partner is found. Jeff and I love making playlists on Spotify and some of our favorite songs from the beginning of our relationship until now are Written in the Sand, Happens Like That, What Ifs, Unforgettable, Meant to Be, Whole Lot in Love, The Bones, More, and Made For You. We started a playlist when we started dating and made it collaborative so we could add to it as time went on. It’s still one of my favorites. If you don’t have Spotify, you should check it out. For $10-15 a month you can listen to almost any full album by any artist new or old. You can also make and share playlists.

When You Need a Good Cry

This song Show Me Around brings tears to my eyes. It really hit me after Gram passed but it makes me think of my dad, sister, and grandpa as well. If you have lost someone this song can bring you some hope even though it will make you a bit sad, too. Drink a Beer, Watch Over You, and I Will Not Say Goodbye are a few more to put on when you are missing your person.

When You Hang out with Your Girlfriends

My sister and I loved listening to music, too. So many songs and CDs make me think of her. A few of our favorites were The Wreckers, Dixie Chicks, Taylor Swift, Luke Bryan, and Indigo Girls. Whenever I hear an older song from one of these artists, I instantly go back to the moment with my sister. One of our favorite songs, when we were tired of a relationship and needed to be strong and move on, was Fergie’s Big Girls Don’t Cry. We used to love driving around to this song with the top-down on my VW EOS signing at the top of our lungs.

So whatever mood you are in, check out a few of these songs. Also, please comment or email me a few of your favorites! I love listening to all kinds of music, especially new artists. Oh btw, three more artists to check out on YouTube, Spotify, Amazon Music, or ApplePlay are O.A.R, Diamond Dixie, and Amber Patino. Enjoy!!

Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

In Family

Jeff’s mom

September 14, 2021 No Comments

As you read in My Prince, I met Jeff in 2017. Prior to this past week, I only met his mother once when we were in Dallas for a wedding. She was having major back issues and seemed very uncomfortable and in a lot of pain. Since then, we have invited Jeff’s mom to several events but she has been hesitant and unwilling to travel. Plus, she had a small dog that needed care. Jeff saw her a few times as he has had layovers in the area.

This summer Jeff’s mom finally said yes! She agreed to come to West Virginia to see her children and grandchildren and other family members. Recently, her little pup was not doing well and needed to be put down. We are heartbroken for her but she no longer had any excuses. So Jeff’s mom was on her way!

Jeff and I agreed to go to Texas to get her and help her maneuver the airport. Although we had to take a roundabout way of getting back to Pennsylvania from Virginia, it was worth it. I think us being there for her really helped her relax and feel more confident about getting on a plane again. Although she was a flight attendant for 25 years she hasn’t really flown since she retired. And I think we were all nervous about how Jeff’s mom would do. But she checked herself in and was at the gate by the time we got our bags and checked back in to met her at the gate. Sometimes you just need to take the leap! And we were so happy that Jeff’s mom was taking the leap at 74!

We were able to celebrate a wonderful birthday dinner as a family with Jeff’s mom on her birthday. She was happy to be surrounded by family on her big day. And we all had a wonderful time. I think sometimes the anxiety of a situation is worse than the actual situation. We all had a great time celebrating this lovely lady. And I hope she felt that, too.

Jeff’s sister lives at the top of a hill in West Virginia with a beautiful overlook. She also has four dogs and Jeff’s mom loved every one of them (as did Gram :)). She has talked about how she loves the views from Jenn’s porch. She loves the birds, the deer, and “even the groundhogs”. Actually, we think she likes it so much that after 35 years away she may move back to West Virginia. And our fingers are crossed that she does!

So in the end it doesn’t matter if you are 8, 15, 21, 32, 50, or 75 the anxiety of a situation is usually much worse than the actual situation. And sometimes no matter how old you are or what situation you are in, sometimes you just need to take the leap!! I, for one, think it will all be alright and whatever will be will be. Just do it!

In Family

MacAttack

September 7, 2021 1 Comment

Happy Birthday to my niece and my mother-in-law!

Today is my niece’s ninth birthday. I cannot believe she is nine already. Where does the time go? I remember holding her the day she was born. She had the darkest hair but a full head of it! When my sister was born she had a full head of the darkest hair, too! Then she became the blondest of blonds. I couldn’t wait to see what this little one would turn into. And just nine years later, she is a beast on the softball field with the nickname MacAttack.

She is the most beautiful little girl. She has blue-green eyes and light brown hair. Watching her grow up has been one of the best experiences of my life. From taking her first steps to saying her first word to learning the colors of the rainbow to reading her first book and now playing softball. It’s just amazing how quickly these little people grow right up.

I miss holding her and cuddling with her. She thinks she’s all grown up. She doesn’t want to hold my hand anymore out in public and rarely will sit on the couch and snuggle. But I hold on to every moment that she does. And I told her I am squeezing her every chance I get. Of course, I get the pre-teen roll of the eyes.

Because my sister loved Luke Bryan so does my niece. I remember MacAttack singing his songs all the time. She knew every word and knows most of the words to every country song now. I love watching her sing and dance. She has no worries or insecurities. She just does what she enjoys doing unlike the rest of us who worry about what we look like. She and my nephew will sing and dance in the back seat of the car or in the restaurant. Watching them is one of my most favorite things to do.

My sister and I were about three years apart and so are my niece and nephew. Although we had our issues, we got along really well, and I miss her so much every day. I am happy to say that my niece and nephew get along really, really well, too. They love playing with each other and MacAttack loves being the big sister. She is so excited to take him to school this year. She will be in fourth grade and he is starting kindergarten. She is protective of him and doesn’t want him to hurt himself when he does all the boy things he does! Just wait until he starts hitting on all of her girlfriends (which he already does!).

I am so proud to be MacAttack’s aunt. I was so proud of her and the way she would treat Babcia (Gram). MacAttack would take her hand and walk her to the door. I hope she learns to be an independent, happy woman. I hope she always sings and dances whenever she feels like it. I hope she knows there is no limit to what she can do and no boundaries. She can be whatever she wants to be. And I hope she knows her aunt is one of her biggest fans.

In How We Move

Happy 70th Birthday Mom!

August 11, 2021 1 Comment

Happy Birthday, Mama! Can’t wait to celebrate together! I incorporated 8/11 and 70 for the reps and time today. I am not sure my mom is thrilled about this workout but if you want something quick to do with a good amount of reps, this workout is for you!

Equipment Needed

none

Weekly Wednesday Workout

In today’s workout, you will have 11 minutes to do 70 reps of 8 different movements. You will need to do these moves quickly to get them all done within the time limit. So get a timer, a mat, and get moving!

Movements:

70 jumping jacks or jump rope
70 squats
70 mountain climbers
70 crunches or abs of your choice
70 lunges
70 high knees
70 sumo squats
70 standing abs (35 each side)

Repeat if you have time left. You can always modify by doing two rounds of 35 reps of each movement.

How to Do the Moves

For the video of movements click here. Remember there are always modifications. Let me know if you need help or suggestions. Don’t forget the warm-up. Make this workout work for you!

In Family

Changes

August 3, 2021 1 Comment

Hello loyal followers,

This past year has shown me how beautiful life is. Although there have been many ups and downs, I continue to give thanks for being so blessed. With that being said, I am trying to make some changes. I am trying to simplify my life, which means simplifying my social media and this blog. I love doing this blog, but for a few months, I felt it was taking time away from my husband and my family. I started this blog to share stories of my Adventures with Gram, and to have something to do when my husband left for work. When I lost Gram, I felt like my inspiration was gone. I wasn’t sure what else to write about. She wasn’t there to make me smile or laugh with her little comments. She wasn’t there by my side when my husband was away, and I missed her. Plus, I didn’t think you wanted to hear about our loss over and over again, and honestly, I wasn’t sure what else to write about.

At this point, I realize I do have many more stories to tell. I have stories about Gram, about caregiving for her, about my travels, and about my journey in love. I want to continue to write, and I hope you will continue to read. My Adventures with Gram, Travel excursions and Family stories will be posted here. I am hoping to get back to a weekly basis, but they will be posted when inspiration finds me 🙂 I LOVE doing the daily inspirations and hope that they inspire you, too. I will also continue with the Weekly Wednesday Workouts. Every now and again I may post a full video here or on Instagram TV but for the most part, I will show you the moves and give you the workout. Please let me know if you need suggestions or modifications.

I am going to try to do more on linked social media and Instagram. Follow me @strong_inspired on Instagram. I will be posting recipes and stories as things come up. Some workouts will also be published on IGTV. Of course, you can always go back and do your favorite workout or find a special recipe on the blog.

I hope you enjoy these changes. If you have any feedback, please email or message me. And please follow me on Facebook and Instagram and share with your friends and family!