feelingblessed Archives - Page 17 of 18 - Inspired & Strong | Making the Best of Every Day with Stacy

Goodbye Gram

March 23, 2021 1 Comment

Tomorrow it will be one month since we lost Gram. Three weeks ago, we said goodbye Gram with a wonderful service. I am not sure you can say that funerals are beautiful or that dead bodies look good but it was a beautiful tribute to Gram and as always Gram looked stunning and so sweet in her casket. She was surrounded by blankets from friends, photos of her family, and of course, her rosary.

Although she didn’t have as many visitors as my grandfather did because of Covid and six added years, it was a wonderful turnout of support for our family. We were surrounded by many friends and family. One of her favorite couples, who called her mama, made the 10-hour drive from Tennessee to pay their respects. Gram would have been honored at the goodbye she received.

At the church service, a former student of Alliance College gave one of the most beautiful and amazing tributes I have ever heard. Click here to play the video. His words summed up Gram in a nutshell. Whoever met her felt the same way. Even the priest who never knew her did an amazing job. (Thank you Meghan D. for the videos and pictures). For the final hymn click here.

After the service, we went to the cemetery to lay her body to rest and to say goodbye Gram. It was a chilly day and the streets were ice-covered. We even had some snow flurries in the air, which she would have loved. Before we moved to Florida for the winters, one of Gram’s favorite pastimes was sitting in her chair and watching the snowfall.

Several people came to Venango Valley Inn and Golf Course for a memorial luncheon. The staff was fantastic and the food was amazing. The owners have known my grandparents for years, and we have all become very close. Every time I would take Gram to dinner at the restaurant she would say, “Where’s Kim?” and head straight for the kitchen. She would bust those doors open and sweet Kim would head over to give Gram a great big hug no matter what she was in the middle of doing. Her friendship and love for my grandparents are beyond words, and I cannot thank her enough for everything that Venango Valley has done for us.

We were surrounded by family, former students, colleagues, and friends. One of my oldest friends in life gave the perfect blessing for the food. I asked her to do this about three minutes before it was time. What an amazing friend to be able to come up with something so beautiful on the spot. I think Gram had that way about her to inspire beautiful words and actions in all of those around her.

It was hard to leave the luncheon because that meant it was over. There was nothing more to do but collect the flowers and picture frames from the funeral home. It was the final goodbye Gram. I didn’t want to do it.

Although I know in my head Gram had a long and absolutely wonderful life, it still hurts my heart that I won’t hear her laugh anymore, I won’t be able to put her in the car and take her to the nearest ice cream shop, I won’t get to hear her say “starość to nie radość” which she told means “it’s hell getting old”, which actually means “old age is not joy”, and I won’t hear her say “I look like death warmed over three times!”, her other famous words.

So I have to say goodbye gram to your earthly body, but I know you will visit by way of cardinals and in my dreams. I look forward to those signs from heaven. Please give everyone up there in heaven a great big hug for us. I know you are singing and dancing and having the most beautiful time. Keep an eye on your great-grandchildren for us. Hold them in your arms and make them feel your presence every day. Love and miss you. Goodbye Gram.

In Pilot's Wife

Dreams

March 16, 2021 No Comments

My husband is a huge Sammy Hagar fan. He’s seen him several times in concert over the years and has taken me a few times. The first time I saw Sammy was in California on the beach. We met up with Jeff’s cousins and had a blast! The weather was perfect. We also found our way into the VIP area for some free drinks and food, which was a great treat.

The next time I saw Sammy was in Cabo San Lucas at his annual birthday bash. We went to meet up with one of Jeff’s buddies there. We enjoyed some time by the pool and the all-inclusive resort. Jeff and I did some dancing in the evenings and saw Sammy play at Cabo Wabo. It was a small intimate venue.

Once I realized Sammy used to be the lead singer for Van Halen I found several songs I knew and loved. Therefore, before the concert, I downloaded some Van Halen songs and started listening. My favorite song became “Dreams.” I don’t know why, but I love that song. I love the words, the meaning, and especially the ending which goes like this…. “So baby dry your eyes, save all the tears you’ve cried, ohh, that’s what dreams are made of, Ohh, baby we belong in a world that must be strong, ohh, that’s what dreams are made of, and in the end on dreams we will depend, cause that’s what love is made of”

Even though I am the worst singer in the world, I LOVE singing. When we first installed the Sonos system in our house, I turned the music on from my bed and turned it up soooo loud and sang along. Yep, you guessed it, the very first song ever played on our system was “Dreams.” I was so happy to have it playing throughout the house. When I have a few adult beverages, the tunes become louder and higher as does my voice!

It really is quite awful but for some reason, I go into my own little world when this song comes on, and I pretend I am a Rockstar. I feel bad for my poor husband and friends who have to endure this performance over and over. But I am extremely grateful for some of my girlfriends who come into my world and rock out with me! One friend, we can call her “Fun Amy”, and I dance our faces off giggling, laughing, and singing at the top of our lungs. Fun Amy is my karaoke partner, my dance on the bar partner, my dance in the middle of the Key West Express partner, and my dance on the kitchen island then jump into the pool partner.

My other girlfriend, Kelly, also enjoys singing Dreams with me. We have sung on a barstool together, in her husband’s truck, and at ski week. This song and these friendships mean the world to me. Yes, when I truly think about it, I know I should be embarrassed and should never open my mouth to sing (or dance for that matter) again, but every once in a while you need to realize life is too short, be wild, be happy, and have some fun!

In Adventures with Gram

Gram, our Matriarch

March 9, 2021 No Comments

Over the past weekend, we laid Gram, our Matriarch, to rest next to her husband, at a cemetery bordering the campus of the old Alliance College. My grandparents had a profound impact on many of the students at the college as well as many others in the community. This is a tribute from one of my grandpa’s former players.

Mrs. Haluch, our Matriarch.

I had the pleasure of meeting Mrs. Haluch over 60 years ago.

In 1957 to be exact…when I was a scared, skinny teenager…with only one suitcase in hand…arriving in Cambridge Springs as a Freshman at Alliance College. She was the first person to make me feel at home. She had two kids of her own, as Stanley and Tusha were young children at the time…yet still had time for me.

I’ve been blessed with over six decades of memories filled with that smile, that giggle…and her voice saying “Bobby, you don’t mind that I still call you Bobby?” I would say without hesitation, “NO Mrs. Haluch…I love that you call me Bobby.”

Many of us associate all of our Cambridge Springs memories with Coach Haluch…but if you really think about it…many of those are linked directly to…Mrs. Haluch. A quiet, gentle, and incredibly strong woman. A leader in her family…her church…and her community.

Remembering those wonderful days playing basketball and baseball for Coach…well…who do you think washed all of those uniforms for so many years? Mrs. Haluch.

All of the Alliance Reunions over the years…there she was making us all feel welcome… making over 500 perogies…yes 500, so when we stopped by over during the weekend, we’d all have something to eat. Always the consummate hostess.

When we would visit on a weekend, we’d go to church before heading back home. You could hear a beautiful voice coming from the choir loft. That’s Mrs. Haluch.

As the years went on…the mentorship continued with Coach and Mrs. Haluch…and a beautiful deeper friendship grew with our family.

Enjoying a Pirate Games at PNC Park…a couple of years ago…the usher giving her a game ball because he couldn’t resist that smile and twinkle in her eye.

Sitting watching a football game at their house…when Mrs. Haluch would blurt out a player’s name, position…and something interesting about them.

Such wonderful sunny days on Ft. Myers Beach. I would sit and talk with Coach and Mrs. Haluch would stroll the beach picking up shells with my wife and daughter. Then we would spend hours laughing…and eating… as we looked out over the Gulf of Mexico. Those are some of my most cherished memories.

At Coach’s 90th Birthday…who do you think stole the show? Mrs. Haluch…dancing with the toy soldier…she looked just like Cinderella.

In more recent years we were blessed to get to know Stacy…she has been an angel to Mrs. Haluch. The two of them…two peas in a pod. Their endless adventures are epic, but what was so special to me…was Stacy’s selfless and tireless dedication to her Gram. That is something that is so rare in today’s society. Stacy…that gift of time with you were given with your Gram…and Matriarch…will remain in your heart forever.

We would try to give Stacy a little break and take Mrs. Haluch on day trips to Waterford and Erie. Our lunches were filled with good food from Carini’s…but of course, it was all about the pie for Mrs. Haluch…the car rides were equally special…when she would tell tales of countless good times her and Coach had over the years.

Our destination was always the Casino, where she would sit at her penny machine having a high old time flanked by my wife and daughter. The best experience…was when she hit the jackpot and thought she broke the machine. We still laugh at the moment when the bells and lights started flashing and ringing and she turned to me and said… “Bobby I think I broke the machine.”

For such a tiny statured woman…she was a Giant…a giant to all of us. Making a Big impact in each of our lives.

Mrs. Haluch was…

The Matriarch of her beloved family – to her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.

The Matriarch of Alliance College

The Matriarch of Cambridge Springs

I imagine and smile thinking about…Mrs. Haluch and Coach enjoying endless polkas and perogies…in Heaven…

I love you Mrs. Haluch. Thank you for being a Matriarch in my family too.

Love,

Bobby F.

In Adventures with Gram

Losing Gram

March 2, 2021 No Comments

Last Wednesday we got the call that we had been anticipating, but never wanted to answer. Gram was unresponsive at 4:40 that morning. We had just made arrangements to bring her back to our home. She hadn’t been eating, drinking, or really talking for about a week. On Tuesday, we had decided to bring her home in Hospice care to live out her final days by the pool, her favorite spot. As you read in Missing Gram, we put her into Senior Living in November 2020.

The hospital bed was in place waiting for her, but I guess she didn’t want to be a burden. She always said that to us, which of course we never thought she was. I guess she didn’t want to put us through having to watch her go. When we left Tuesday, I hugged her so tight. I told her we were bringing her home. I told her she could come to sit by the pool and sleep with Kuma, her favorite feline. But I guess she wanted it another way.

It hurts my heart so much that she is gone. I knew the day would come, but over the past few years, she has defied death so many times that we thought she would live forever! This woman…so strong, so mighty, so inspiring. She is in heaven now dancing the polka with her hubby (and possibly giving him a piece of her mind ) It won’t be the same. We are sad about our loss, but we are excited for her reunion with her husband, son, son-in-law, and granddaughter. Gram, please tell them we love and miss them.

I am grateful that the road I took led me to caregiving for Gram. It led me to my husband, wonderful friends, and amazing adventures. I will never regret one moment with her. She told me once I was like the sister she never had, and she was my best friend, always there to listen (whether she wanted to or not).

Although she is gone and I won’t have any new adventures with her, I plan on continuing to write about our past outings. Even though she isn’t on this earth anymore she will forever be in my heart inspiring me and pushing me to do the right thing and live life to the fullest.

Viewing and the funeral will be in Pennsylvania on March 5 and 6. Click here for details. We will also do a celebration of life in Fort Myers, Florida in April.

In Family

Friends

February 23, 2021 2 Comments

I can’t express to you how amazing my friends are. Family is one thing, and I am blessed with a small, close immediate family and a huge, wonderful extended family. But my friends’ network is beyond words. They always say quality over quantity, but I believe that somehow I got both. I have friends that I have had since birth (literally our moms were in the same hospital room), since elementary school, since high school, since college, since California, since Virginia, since Thailand, since back to Pennsylvania when I started caring for Gram, and now since Florida. It seems that the older I get and different life circumstances occur, it seems the more wonderful people I meet.

From elementary school, I have a core group of friends. Although our paths took different turns, we managed to stay in touch. It didn’t matter if we saw each other every month or once a year, we would get together and it was as if no time had passed. We support each other through beautiful weddings and some heartbreaks. Some of us had children and some were lucky enough to inherit stepchildren. Some of us stayed in the small town where we grew up and others decided to leave. But these women and men have been there for me through good and bad times. And I can’t say enough about their support of gram and me over the past five years. I also have a boxful of notes from some of them from fifth grade forward. I can’t wait for us to get together to read through some of these over some wine one of these days.

Then I was off to college. There I met another group of fantastic ladies. We were from all different states and even though we are now spread all over the globe, and we don’t keep in touch as often as we should, we have a bond that remains. When we do get together or do a Zoom call, it brings my heart so much joy to see their beautiful faces and talk about their children and careers. Again, some decided to have children, some didn’t, some have been married, some have suffered the loss of a husband, some have been divorced and some have long-time partners. Although the differences in paths mean some loss of communication and closeness, we continue to cheer each other on from afar. And when we can meet up, it’s like we go back to those days sitting outside our apartment in college having coffee talk about the night before.

I have another group of friends that I met in Virginia through my education career and by participating in social sports. Richmond has some great adult league social sports you can play such as kickball, football, and wiffleball. We had so much fun playing these sports especially when we won a few championships! Although we don’t stay in touch as often as we should, these folks are always willing to help each other out. Receiving a text out of the blue from one of these special people always makes my heart happy. We may not talk or see each other often, but they all pass through my mind and my heart more often than they probably know.

When I went to Thailand, I met two very special ladies in Richmond before we left. We bonded right away because of our sense of adventure and the fear of the unknown. Once we got to Thailand, we met 30 more people who all had similar interests in traveling and teaching children. I am Facebook friends with many of these people, and recently I reconnected with one wonderful woman who can bring a smile to anyone’s face with her cuteness.

When I moved back to my hometown to provide care and companionship to Gram, I was excited to see my hometown girlfriends and their families. Whenever I would go to our small town sporting events, it was like a high school reunion. It was so much fun! We all had many things going on, but we got together as often as we could. Then I joined CrossFit Meadville and made another group of fantastic friends. I love that there are so many badass women in this gym. Most of these women are married, but in the beginning, they took me on as the odd wheel, and I loved it. When I introduced them to Jeff, they embraced him just as well. This crew enjoys Sunday Fun Days and brewery tours. They also love coming to Florida in the winter to visit. And we love spending our summers in Pennsylvania near them.

Once Gram and I started spending winters in Florida, we met more married couples that Jeff has been friends with for years. Friends he has met through his work or through his sons’ school or sporting events. I love these couples, and although I am still working on developing woman relationships in this area, I enjoy hanging out with them and going to dinner.

Another group of friends I adore is our ski club friends. Jeff started taking me skiing in 2018, and I met some very amazing people while skiing. Most of these friends are in the airline industry which is very intriguing to me. These friends come to ski weeks from all over the United States, and now I have friends to visit all over the country. It is amazing to me to keep meeting such generous and fun-loving people. It truly makes me so happy and makes me believe in the good of this world.

Lastly, I have a group of friends that I have met because of my grandparents. Many of my grandfather’s past basketball players send cards, messages, letters and through these, I have tried to keep the relationship going with Gram. Every time we meet up with someone from the old college, she has the biggest smile on her face. She always knows where they live and usually what they are doing. It amazes me. My husband and I love hearing the stories about my grandpa and how much he meant to them as a coach as well as the life lessons they learned through him. We miss him so much, and I love that he had such an impact on these gentlemen and their families.

This post is for you, my friends. You all know who you are and please know that I love and cherish each one of you. You made my transitions in each area of my life bearable and enjoyable. I am so blessed to be able to count on so many of you for anything, and I hope you feel the same about us. It makes my heart so warm to know that you are all out there. And it makes my heart happy to know how much you love and care about sweet Gram.

In Pilot's Wife

Once I was a Wingman- Part 3

February 11, 2021 No Comments

Everyone wants to be loved. The desire to be loved, to be valued, and to be happy is universal. So when my single guy-friend Jeff was interested in a woman, I felt duty-bound to assist in his effort to get to know her. After all, he was my friend, and I cared about him, so of course, I wanted him to find someone who would love him, who would value him, and who would make him happy.

I met Jeff at the Gym. It happened to be a CrossFit Gym, and anyone who knows CrossFit also knows that it’s not like your typical gym. At CrossFit, you are all performing the same workout, at the same time, and most people go to the gym many times a week, at the same time. So a sense of community and camaraderie develops – you get to know each other.

At the time, Jeff and I were both navigating the dating scene. We had a lot in common, as we were the same age, we were both parents of late-teen or young adult children, had been divorced, and loved Crossfit. Becoming friends was natural. I respected Jeff, too. He was aware, had learned a lot of lessons in his life, was smart and thoughtful about things that mattered, and I began asking his advice when it came to the men I was dating and things that would come up. He, in turn, began sharing what was going on in his life and asking for a female perspective. On occasion, we’d go drink beer and eat chicken wings while we talked it all over.

So if “Wingman” is defined as someone who helps a friend with romantic relationships, then I suppose he was mine and I was his. But Dictionary.com goes on to say “especially one who helps the friend attract a woman…”

Back to the gym, and why I have been forever dubbed Jeff’s “Wingman”. It was February 2017, Jeff and I had made plans to go to a Saturday Boot Camp because it was designed to be a Partner Workout, so we agreed to meet and do it together. As we were warming up as a group, Jeff was admittedly a bit distracted by an unfamiliar athletic female backside in front of us. At the time, I had just met an amazing guy myself and wanted the same for Jeff. I actually thought he might ditch me for this very pretty lady who was visiting our gym, but he remained loyal to his commitment, and I was determined to chat with her after class.

Her name was Stacy, and she was friendly, adorable, and easy to talk to. While we stretched, we talked, and I made every effort to mention my friend, Jeff, and what a cool cat he was. Stacy was visiting from out of town and shared that she was here with her Gram (who she took care of), that they had a condo here, and she came often. I remember thinking at the time that this woman was incredibly unique if she took care of her grandmother full-time. I also remember we talked about local restaurants, and then we exchanged phone numbers.

Of course, I helped Jeff get Stacy’s number, and they took it from here. A couple of days later Jeff told me they went to the beach on Sunday, had some cocktails, had some fun, and he hoped he would see her again.

Some four years later, Jeff and Stacy are married, as am I to that amazing guy I mentioned earlier. Stacy and I have become close friends, and I adore her. What an incredible woman who turned out to be the best person I could ever imagine for Jeff, and he for her.

This story begins and ends with Jeff and Stacy, who now love each other, value each other, and make each other happy every day. And I am no longer a Wingman.

May anyone out there who is single be inspired by Jeff and Stacy’s random meeting and remarkable outcome. Just stay the course, be strong, and know that yours too could be just around the corner.

Guest Post Written by Eleina R.

Eleina is an amazing wingman, crossfitter, entrepreneur, wife, mother, friend, and web designer in the Venice, FL area. Check out her business E’s Website Design for all your website or blogging needs. She and Jeff have been friends since they started doing CrossFit together in 2015. Stacy and she have been friends for four years since they met this day four years ago after Boot Camp in 2017. Both couples remain great friends to this day.

In Pilot's Wife

New Girl? Part 2

February 9, 2021 No Comments

I missed the new girl the first two days she was at the gym. But that’s how fate works. We met on a Saturday, but for me, it started the night prior.

I had just broken up with a girlfriend, and my friend, Eleina was navigating through Match.com. We would go out for “wing therapy” which consisted of wings, beer, and honest talk of what men and women are really thinking. So after a Friday night of wings and beer, we decided to go to Saturday Bootcamp.

Bootcamp was at 10 am, which was perfect after a night of drinking. A little late for Stacy as she had been going to 5 am CrossFit, and I usually went to the 8 am class. I met E upon arrival, and we chatted briefly before the group warm-up started. This is where I first noticed the “new girl”. We were instructed to the wall and started with leg swings. She somehow managed to get between myself and E even though we were talking during the warm-up. CrossFit is a group class and the “community” we have prompted us to part a bit to allow her a space along the wall. As we exited from the wall to continue the warm-up, Eleina was still talking as my eyes moved towards this “new girl”. I gave E a “shhh” with a finger held in front of my lips and pointed to her with my other hand. Yes, I noticed something beautiful and intriguing that morning.

E and I partnered for the 30+ minute Bootcamp workout. While these were usually long grinders, I stayed focused on the workout. It was easily recognizable that this “new girl” was quite athletic and had an amazing work ethic in the gym. Definitely not her first workout.

After the workout, the group gathered on the floor for a post-workout stretch. Eleina and I sat beside this new girl and chatted about the work that we had just accomplished. Stacy was her name, and she was down from PA enjoying the Florida sunshine and helping her gram recover from a broken hip. Her grandparents had a condo here and this was the first time that gram had been here since her husband had passed away.

We continued to chat and I offered suggestions of things to do in Ft. Myers. Little did I know that Stacy and her family had been coming to Ft. Myers for about 15 years. But I continued rambling on thinking this was her first time here. Stacy mentioned that she had friends coming in that night and was looking forward to seeing old friends from high school. I then mentioned that I was going to the beach the next day, and I asked Stacy if she would like to join me. “How are you going to take her to the beach if you don’t have her number?”, Eleina chimed in. Stacy and I kinda stared at each other, smiled, and then we exchanged numbers.

By now it was after 11 am and Stacy was concerned about gram being home alone. We all parted ways for the day. A few hours later Stacy texted. I forget what exactly she said, but it led to our first date the next day at the beach. I promptly texted E and said, “she texted!” I am not sure who was more excited to go to the beach the next day as I had not been there in a while. And yes, that “plan” to go to the beach was only in effect if I had Stacy with me. I certainly wasn’t planning to go without her. That was just part of my “pick up line”. And that is how I met the new girl.

Guest Post was Written by Jeff F.

Jeff is Stacy’s (the new girl’s) husband and partner in crime. Jeff is an avid crossfitter, pilot, boater, amazing husband, brother, and father. Jeff has been in the Fort Myers area for over 20 years. He enjoys being a snowbird and spending the summers up north in Gram’s house in PA.

In Pilot's Wife

How We Met- Part 1

February 8, 2021 No Comments

As you read in, The Broken Hip, Gram broke her hip in December 2016 but by February she was making great strides. We left the snow for the sun and ended up at her condo in Fort Myers.

Since I had just started CrossFit, I googled CrossFit gyms near the condo. I found a few and decided on CrossFit Thoroughbreds. I took a few CrossFit classes and met some great people and instructors. It was my first time dropping into other boxes, and I fell in love with the CrossFit community. On Saturday, February 11, 2017, I decided to try Boot Camp. After class, I met two amazing people who would significantly impact my life. One would later become my husband and the other one gave me the tools and the support to start this blog. (Their stories of “how we met” will be published this week. Stay Tuned!)

I arrived at Boot Camp a little early and was stretching and warming up. I observed a man and woman having a conversation about what seemed to be some kitchen renovations and possibly an ex. They both talked fairly loud so it was easy to eavesdrop 🙂 They seemed to be very good friends who had a history of being there for each other. I was intrigued by their conversation and wanted to know more about both of them. The guy was good looking, and he seemed like he was about my age, but I can never tell. Plus, he had on a hat and you never know what’s underneath that! They both had great figures and looked like they were dedicated athletes.

During the workout, they were partners while I was in another group. I remember it being a pretty tough workout with push-ups and running. I also remember looking out of the corner of my eye to see how good of an athlete this guy was. I found they both worked hard and were impressive in their moves.

After class, the woman, who was sitting next to the man, said hi to me and asked if I was new to town. I explained I was only there for about two weeks and was taking care of my grandmother. I told them I had friends coming to town that night so they gave me some suggestions on where to take them. The guy mentioned he had some time off from work and wanted to know if I wanted to meet him the next day and go to the beach. Because I am a Yes Woman I didn’t hesitate to say it sounded like a fabulous idea. We chatted a few more minutes and before we parted ways, Eleina, the amazing wing woman, said how can he contact you without your number. I laughed and probably rolled my eyes. In the end, we exchanged numbers and the rest is history 🙂

I still find it hard to believe that quitting my job in 2015 led me back to my hometown which led me to caregiving for Gram which led me to CrossFit which in turn led me to my prince. I would not have met my husband if I hadn’t taken that leap of faith. And I wouldn’t have found him if God hadn’t placed me right where I needed to be at that moment.

This week is dedicated to our story of how we met four years ago this week. No, it wasn’t love at first sight and no, we didn’t start dating right away because we were in two different states. But we met and that was just the beginning.

Jeff, my husband, and Eleina, the wing woman will be writing posts Tuesday and Thursday of how our first meeting went from their perspectives. Check them out!

In Pilot's Wife

My Prince

January 26, 2021 4 Comments

My Prince… Finally! After All Those Frogs

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Stacy. Her mom read her princess stories like Cinderella and Snow White. She watched movies like 16 Candles and The Breakfast Club. She believed in love and believed one day she would find her Prince.

The High School Years

Stacy “liked” boys in grade school, but it was grade school so it wasn’t anything serious. In 7^thgrade, she was swept away by an older guy, and they were together for three years. While she had a great experience with him, she missed out on dances and a lot of girly things during those middle school years. During high school, she dated on and off but was more interested in hanging with her friends, especially her best friend, Missy, than anything else. She wanted to be free to discover and experience all high school had to offer.

The College Years

In college, Stacy thought for sure she would find “her prince”. She dated a guy for about a year, but it just didn’t work out. After that, she continued to enjoy her friends and all the experiences college had to offer.

After college, she moved to California and then to Virginia. Stacy dated here and there, but she was one of those girls who would rather do what she wanted to do rather than be in a relationship and have to compromise. She just couldn’t be with someone who annoyed her within the first month. So she stayed single and enjoyed life.

The Richmond Years

When she was 23, she met a guy and thought maybe this was her prince. They spent a couple of years together, got married, then got divorced. Nope, just another frog. After that, Stacy started reading a blog called “The Spinsterlicious Life” because that clearly seemed to be the path she was on. In one of the posts, Eleonore Wells wrote about how there are relationship people and there are single people. She said you are either better at being annoyed (in relationships) or you are better at being lonely (single).

That post rang true to Stacy. She discovered she definitely was a single person. She realized all this time of dating that she was just better at being lonely than being annoyed. It made so much sense! Therefore, she played sports, she traveled, and she spent time with friends and family. She was still on her journey to find her prince, but she wasn’t sure he was going to find her.

The Best Years

Once she started caregiving for Gram, she really wondered if there was anyone out there. Who would take on her, let alone her, her grandmother, and a cat? She decided there probably wasn’t a lot of hope so she made a commitment to enjoy herself, the opportunities that presented themselves, and her time with Gram.

Then it happened. She met him. Instead of pushing things too hard or worrying too much, she tried to have the motto “if it’s meant to be it will be”. She hoped it would be, but she also knew her life circumstances may prevent that.

Funny how just the opposite happened. Her life circumstances led her to him. And enabled her to spend more time with him than her previous life circumstances would have allowed. She found a guy who was willing AND able to make the distance between them short. She found a guy who was willing to love her, her grandmother, and the cat(mostly)! She found a guy who somehow loved her for her. She didn’t pretend to be anyone else. She found a guy who was willing to listen. She found someone who loved many of the same things she did…traveling, working out, eating right, being outside, boating, trying new things, and striving to be better every day. She found her Prince!

Stacy is so blessed to be where she is today. To be with a man who loves her with his whole heart and who tries every day to make her life a little easier. To be able to care for her Grandmother who makes her day brighter by making some funny comments in the bathroom. To be able to live in two different states and have amazing friends and family in both. To be able to pursue her dream and write this blog. To be able to tell you, you might have to kiss a lot of frogs but someday you WILL find your Prince.

In Adventures with Gram

Traveling with Gram

January 12, 2021 2 Comments

Over the Christmas holiday, we took on the task of traveling with Gram to Virginia to see the family. Although she still remembers all of us, she really has no concept of where she is in the world or how far away Virginia is. When we travel with Gram we usually hear the question “Where are we going?” about 150 times 🙂 We usually fly out of Fort Lauderdale because there is a direct flight from Lauderdale to Richmond. Therefore, we have about a two-hour drive to begin the trip. Gram loves riding in the car. She looks out the window and reads all of the road signs. She doesn’t say much unless she wants to tell us who lived in certain towns or to ask the question “Where are we going?” We tell her every time yet she doesn’t remember.

When we pull up to the airport she asks “Where are we going?” or “Who is leaving?” because many times she and I take my husband to the airport when he has to go to work. Needless to say, I get her in the wheelchair, and we roll along to the security line.

Traveling with Gram is always an adventure. She has never liked flying but over the past five years I have made her become a frequent flyer, and she has done very well. We got her a transport wheelchair because the first few times we traveled we used the airport wheelchairs. And although they are very nice, I would rather be on my own time instead of having to wait for someone to push her. I also got her TSA precheck because we were traveling so much. If you travel frequently, I highly suggest you get TSA precheck. It is so smooth and nice. I am always nervous with Gram in the security line because I am afraid she’s going to say something loud and inappropriate. She can walk through the metal detector but she has touched the sides before and had to go through again. Plus she can’t hear so I am always afraid they are going to say something to her and she won’t hear them.

Once we are through the line and she is settled back in her chair, we roll to the gate. We ask to gate-check her wheelchair and many times the gate agent will move us up a few rows. I always appreciate this! We also get to board first which is such a great benefit of traveling with Gram.

After we are checked in, we usually head to the restroom. This is one of the hardest parts of traveling with Gram. The companion restrooms are a blessing and make it easier. But we go to the restroom and get ready to fly. We go to the gate, and she usually sits there just people watching as we all do at the airport. But every now and again, the question comes up “Where are we going??”.

She does really well boarding the plane. Smiles at everyone and takes the window seat. I usually keep the window closed during take-off. I always worry she will get upset about flying because she never really liked it but to this day it’s been smooth sailing. She just asks the repetitive question again and again “Where are we going?”. On this last trip, she was eating a muffin. I felt bad for the poor gentleman beside us because she asked at every bite “What is This?”.

Over the years, traveling with Gram has opened my eyes to many things. First, TSA precheck is a must. Secondly, you never know how far you will have to walk to your gate. These things don’t really cross your mind as a young adult but when you travel with the elderly you realize how BIG airports really are. You also are grateful for elevators and shuttles. I have also learned that it is ok to buy a one-way ticket to your destination and wait to buy a one-way ticket back. I also discovered that it’s ok to fly different airlines on the same trip. Yes, you have to pay attention to baggage restrictions, but you can find yourself better deals if you don’t mind researching a bit.

Because we usually travel with Gram to Virginia we have learned to leave a lot of our winter clothes there. That’s usually where we need them and that helps us to pack lightly. We pretty much have a wardrobe at my mom’s house with all of our toiletries which makes it very nice for flying. We usually just have a small bag each. It’s also very nice to have the wheelchair to hang them on instead of having to carry them 🙂 Spirit is one of my favorite airlines. If you live close to an airport, go to the counter to get your tickets. You get a discount buying Spirit and Frontier tickets at the airport.

Yes, it can be difficult to travel with someone who is in their 90’s, but if you look at all the positives, it actually can be a really great experience. When I travel without her I really miss the perks of traveling with Gram although I don’t miss answering the question “Where are we going?”.