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I think for us as humans it’s easy to pass judgment. It’s easy to say they should have done it this way. Or they shouldn’t be doing it that way. But we need to remember we are not here to judge. We are all different and we all make different choices. Sometimes we don’t agree with the choices of others but that’s where understanding comes in. Quit judging and start loving and understanding.

It’s easy to judge. It’s more difficult to understand. Understanding requires compassion, patience, and a willingness to believe that good hearts sometimes choose poor methods. Through judging, we separate. Through understanding, we grow.

– Doe Zantamata

Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

I know it’s been a few weeks since I posted and I am sorry. We have been all over the country enjoying the fall weather and spending time with family and friends. I found this quote this morning and needed to post it before we take off for another adventure this weekend. We are so blessed in this life with our family and friends. I hope that every time you get to spend time with loved ones, I hope you feel grateful. I know it’s hard but you can’t take these things for granted. One day you will not be able to call up that person on the phone, dress up in sixties gear to celebrate their birthday, or drop by their house to drink too much beer and stay up too late. Be grateful for the times you get to share together and enjoy the many moments of laughter.

“For me, every hour is grace. And I feel gratitude in my heart each time I can meet someone and look at his or her smile.”

~ Elie Wiesel

Photo by Alex Shute on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

Autumn is such a beautiful time of year. The vibrant colors on the trees show us how magical nature is. Then it reminds us that you have to let things go. Don’t hold on to grudges. Don’t fixate on the past. Each year show your beautiful colors then let the things go that are holding you back.

“Autumn shows us how beautiful it is to let things go.”

-unknown

Picture of Autumn in Park City downloaded from a Facebook post.

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

Mindset by definition: is a habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations.

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about mindset and how it can impact our lives. I feel like two people can look at the same situation and have two completely different thoughts about it. Some look up at a beautiful blue sky and only see the sun while the person standing right beside them sees the one cloud in the sky and can only worry about when it is going to rain. It is very intriguing. I believe it comes down to our state of mind and how we view the events in our lives.

Depending on the circumstances thrown at us and the lessons we’ve learned, we have different ways of viewing and reacting to life’s circumstances. I think many times, we as humans, tend to lean towards the negative. Our brains seem to remember the bad times more than the good times. Why do we do that? According to the article below, psychologists refer to this as negativity bias. It’s easier to see and remember the negative because it has more of an impact on us. Therefore, we need to make a conscious effort to stay positive.

My husband says it all the time… life is about making choices (and living with the consequences of those choices). We are thrown into many circumstances in life. We have hundreds of choices to make every day. Are we washing our hair? Going to the gym? Drinking beer? Smoking cigarettes? Using sugar in our coffee or almond milk? Are we trying to eat healthy or stopping at the fast food restaurant? These are all choices, and they all have consequences that go with them. If you decide to eat out at a fast food restaurant every day for lunch and you get a double cheeseburger and fries then most likely you are going to gain weight and health problems may occur. On the flip side, if you have an important test coming up and you study and understand the material, the consequence is likely a good grade. This is your choice, and we are all free to make them. So what is your mindset? What are your goals? What do you want out of life? And are you happy with the choices you are making?

A positive mindset isn’t just for those day-to-day decisions. It also determines how we will react to those bigger life circumstances. Remember, we cannot control the circumstances around us (the event) but we can control our REACTIONS to the situations. We may lose a loved one. We may get laid off from a job. We may have our car broken into. The question is how do we react to these situations? What is our mindset?

If we have a negative mindset then we can get down, be depressed, blame others, and not take responsibility for our own lives. Yes, it’s ok to be sad sometimes. But we need to pick ourselves up. If we lose our job we can blame our employer, our family, or the economy. We can believe it is the worst thing that ever happened to us. We can sit at home and sulk about how terrible life is. OR we can take responsibility, change our mindset, and we can say wow this is a wonderful opportunity to go back to school, learn a new skill, or start our own business.

Having a positive mindset can be challenging. Sometimes it takes therapy. Maybe it takes good friends to help you realize life is not all bad. It definitely takes a conscious effort and hard work. The thing we need to realize is we cannot blame others for our situations, and we cannot compare our lives to others. Every single one of us has experienced heartbreak, death, disappointment, and sadness. And every single one of us has a different reaction to those experiences. Some of us have done the work and are striving for the silver lining. We cannot blame them. It does not mean they haven’t forgotten or that it doesn’t hurt anymore. It just means they are consciously reframing the negative thoughts in their head and striving for positive outcomes. We need to look within ourselves and see if we are stuck in a negative mindset. Then we need to decide what WE can do individually to help ourselves.

Just because “bad” things happen, doesn’t mean it’s time to give up. It just means there a different road is ahead and now we have a choice. Are we going to be strong and recover from the setback or are we going to continue letting circumstances control us? If we believe our life sucks then it will. If we see the world in a negative way we need to try to turn our thinking around as this helpful article suggests. Remember:

“Life is amazing. Even when it sucks, it is amazing, and we should be grateful for every moment.”

— Hal Elrod

Our mindset is the most critical piece of the puzzle. How we view our life and its’ circumstances is under our control. Believing in ourselves and trying to find the silver lining is well within us. We just need to do the work and change the way we see things.

Photo by Katrina Wright on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

I learned as a caregiver that even though your loved one needs you, you need to take care of yourself, your needs, and your happiness first. Then you will be able to shine brightly for your loved one. We need to learn our internal selves are what we need to prioritize. Everything else after that will fall into place.

 “If you make your internal life a priority, then everything else you need on the outside will be given to you and it will be extremely clear what the next step is.”


— Gabrielle Bernstein

Photo by Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

I try to write inspiring and uplifting posts, but sometimes I need to write about the sad stuff. Life is too short to hold grudges, be mad, sad, or down on yourself. But sometimes you can get in a funk and sometimes it’s hard to pull yourself out of it. That’s why it’s important to have a sound support system. Sometimes you need some positive reinforcement from your friends or family.

family at the wedding

It’s hard to be positive especially when you’ve been hit with tragic events over and over. Losing a loved one, losing your job, losing your partner to divorce or separation, becoming distant from your family, or not hearing from your best friend can be huge downers. These are life circumstances. They are sad, and no one ever said it would be easy.

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Yes, we can get down on ourselves. We can feel left out. We can feel depressed or pissed off. And yes, sometimes you need to sit in your private space, be sad, and have a good cry. Let it all out. Scream. Shout. Tell the world it’s not fair. Tell God you are upset. But then you need to pull yourself together and search deep within your soul. What has got you down? What has caused the feelings inside of you? Remember, we can only control our reactions to the circumstances that are thrown at us.

Over the years, I have lost several of my family members. I could be down and mad at the world. And sometimes I am. Sometimes I wonder why our family? Why did my sister have to go? Why isn’t my dad here with us anymore? And that’s okay. I am allowed to be sad sometimes. But I have to realize I cannot control their death. I cannot bring them back. I can only control how I react to the situation. I can only learn from their death that life is so very short and that one day I will reconnect with them. Until then why shouldn’t I try to be positive and spread kindness in this world? Why shouldn’t I enjoy the days I have left on this Earth? Why shouldn’t I try to experience all this world has to offer?

dad and sis

And maybe my circumstances are different than others. I don’t have to work full-time or stay in one place for an extended period. And for me, that is what I enjoy. I love living the gypsy life! Even if you have a job or need to stay in one place you can make it an adventure. Treat your city as if you are a tourist. What can you explore on your days off? Can you rent a bike and take a ride? Can you take a Sunday drive and head out into the country or to a park to enjoy the peacefulness? There are ways to make the world around you a wonderful place. You just need to start with you. What do you enjoy?

Remember, you have to do what makes you happy and what you have control over. Waiting for your best friend to call isn’t something you can control. You need to reach out or you need to move on. You cannot control your best friend. Waiting for the man of your dreams to show up on your doorstep isn’t going to happen either. You need to put yourself in situations where you can meet new people. It’s scary and intimidating, but taking that first step is the hardest. But I promise it will be worth it!

It is also important to have friends that inspire you. It is important to have friends that are there for you through the good and bad times. It is important to have a friend you can call when you are down. Hopefully, your friends can pick you up when you are sad. Sometimes friends can be more understanding and supportive than your family. That’s why it’s important to choose friends who lift you up. My Prince and I are blessed with the best of friends.

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In the end, it is okay to be sad sometimes, but please don’t let that sadness ruin your life. Life is too short, my friends. Turn your circumstances around. Find a powerful, uplifting song! Find a better, happier place for you within you. Take control of your life and make it the best life it can be! Take the Leap of Faith and do all those things you’ve always wanted to do!

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Photo by Kristina Tripkovic on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

 

Today would have been 99 years for Gram. Wow. What an amazing life. Even though she only made it to 96 1/2 she showed people what it meant to be alive. I miss her so much and wish I could kiss her sweet little face and help her celebrate her day.

gram in snow with skates

99 years. Can you even imagine? I remember when I was a little kid looking up at my parents and thinking they were so old. I calculate the ages they were then and now I am older than they were! Oh, how times have changed because clearly, 47 is not so old anymore!

As I sit here and contemplate all the losses I’ve had over the past 11 years, I think what a difference in ages of all my people’s deaths. Dad was 60. My uncle was 61. My grandpa thrived until 90. My sister was just getting started at 38. And Gram was called up at 96. Why do the numbers make us feel that some people missed out while others lived a full life? Does it make it better that they are older when they go? And why? Is it true that my grandparents lived a full life while my sister and my dad missed out? Just because they only lived to be 38 and 60 does it mean they were incomplete? Or did they find love and happiness and did they pass onto the next adventure complete and full?

family

I don’t know the answers. I know how I feel and I know what the Medium told me when I connected with them. I feel like the older we are the more we get to see, the more we get to experience, and the more we get to do. But what if you find happiness at a young age? Or what if you never explore anything at all? Is your life still complete because that’s the way you wanted to live it? Why do we feel bad for those who had to leave this world at a young age? Why do we feel bad when anyone has to leave this world at all? If we believe there is something more then we truly should be celebrating that those souls are in the most peaceful and magical place. So why does it hurt so bad? And why does our grief overwhelm us at times? I think we are really sad for ourselves because we feel incomplete without our people, and we can’t get past the fact that they are okay without us.

All I know is that I miss my people and sometimes it hits harder than on other days. I need to do a better job of recognizing the signs from Heaven that they send me. I know when we meet again it will be amazing and even though sometimes I feel sorry for myself because they are not here, I know I need to celebrate that they are in a better place.

gram and us

So here’s to you, Gram, we wish you a happy birthday and hope you have a wonderful time celebrating your 99 years up there with the family. We miss you all terribly and can’t wait until we can all celebrate together again. Until then we will toast you and look for those signs. Have the happiest of birthdays, sweet gram!

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy

Last week I wrote a post wishing my sister a Happy Heavenly Birthday which also was Why I Launched on August 8 three years ago. Therefore, my blog is now three years old! Happy Birthday to me! We have made some changes over the years as I started with Daily Inspirations five times a week, Weekly Wednesday Workouts, and Friday Fixins. Those posts are still there and there are plenty of workouts to get you started on your fitness journey as well as recipes to help you eat better and feel better!

After about a year of blogging and after Gram passed away, our lives got a little busier. I wasn’t home taking care of her, and I was going on more adventures with my Prince. I continued to try to get posts out every week. I started doing posts on Tuesdays about Family, my Adventures with Gram, our Travels, and being a Pilot’s Wife. I also started doing Weekly Wednesday Words just once a week instead of daily.

This third year has been filled with even more adventures and the blog has been less consistent. I know I should be capturing our adventures but sometimes it’s so hard to find the time to write! Thank you for continuing to follow me.

As you know I had a meeting with the Medium. He told me I needed to start writing and working on a book. I hate to not do my blog because I love writing these posts for you. But I also would like to write a book, too. Therefore, the posts may be even more inconsistent. Thank you to those who already have but, I suggest subscribing to the blog by going to the main page here and scrolling down about halfway. Look at the right side and you will see where you can put in your name and email and Subscribe! That way you won’t miss the posts whenever they come out!

I wish you the best of the rest of your summer and those who have started school already, I wish you a happy, healthy school year!

Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

Stay Strong & Be Inspired, Stacy