As I have said many times before, happiness is a choice. Choose happy. A happy life doesn’t find you when certain things happen or go your way. You make your own happiness by being present in the moment, being grateful for what you have, and enjoying the little things.
“You do not find the happy life. You make it.”
– Camilla Eyring Kimball
Too many times we are coerced into visiting family or friends. Sometimes people make you feel guilty that you don’t visit often enough. But let us remember they can visit you, too! Let’s live this life without guilt. Do what you feel is best for you and live a happy life.
Don’t let people guilt you for not visiting them. They’re not visiting you either.
-unknown
Photo by Ethan Sykes on Unsplash
This is the week to celebrate America’s birthday and our independence! Sometimes I think we take for granted the freedoms we have been granted here in America. Let’s remember our forefathers who fought so hard for our Independence, who believed in this country, and who wanted all citizens to have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness!
“I believe in America because we have great dreams, and because we have the opportunity to make those dreams come true.”
– Wendell L. Wilkie
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash
It is hard not to react to words said or events without emotion. We can be hurt by things people say or do. We can be emotional about things that happen. And it’s ok to feel that way for a little bit but then we need to step back, take a deep breath and remember that we cannot control events or other people’s actions. All we can control is OUR reaction to it. React with your head not with your heart. Do unto other’s as you would have them do unto you.
You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is sitting back and observing things with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you that means everyone else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass.
~ Warren Buffet
Photo by Ethan Sykes on Unsplash
In life and in sports, we experience failure. The key is how we react to those failures. How do we respond? Do we get back up and stand tall? Do we shake it off and keep going? Do we fail with dignity and respect?
“A champion is defined not by their wins but by how they can recover when they fall.”
– Serena Williams
Photo by Alexas_Fotos on Unsplash
Sometimes, life throws unexpected challenges our way which can lead to disappointment, and it is during those times that we truly discover who our real family and true friends are. It breaks my heart when I hear of or experience family members who have chosen to sever ties with their family over trivial matters especially when it is done with no explanation or communication.
Family is supposed to be the foundation of love, support, and understanding. We expect them to be there, through thick and thin, standing by our side no matter what. If we can’t depend on family who can we depend on? But when materialistic concerns take precedence over genuine connections, it leaves us feeling nothing but sad and empty.
We have all heard the stories of how families are torn apart especially after a family member dies and there is some type of disagreement over the will or the estate. I never thought that money could be the reason for such a loss, but I hear of more and more families being torn apart by materialistic things. It is unreal to me. My grandparents were so generous with the small amount of money they had. I remember my grandfather saying we can’t take it with us. Therefore, every birthday and holiday he gave monetary gifts to his children and grandchildren. And when my dad died, my mom gave my sister and me more money than she kept. What a generous gesture to give money when they didn’t have to.
I know misunderstandings can occur and that leads to frustration. If we would just pick up the phone and have a conversation I believe a lot of estrangements could be solved. But maybe I am naive. Maybe I believe there is good in every person. But maybe people don’t think like I do. Maybe people don’t see the good in others. Maybe they are only out for themselves and what they want. Maybe people don’t look out for one another. Maybe they don’t even realize how selfish they are being. And that makes me sad especially when it comes to family.
I believe that love and compassion are far more valuable than any material possession. It pains me to realize that some family members place a price tag on relationships, valuing their financial gain over the family bonds that were once cherished.
It’s disheartening to witness how easily relationships can crumble when faced with materialistic temptations, leaving us questioning the very essence of family. However, despite the pain and disappointment, we must remember that true family is not defined solely by blood ties. It extends beyond that, encompassing those who choose to be there for us, support us emotionally, and genuinely care about our well-being. That is why we have the best of friends.
In these moments, we must lean on the genuine bonds we have formed with those who have shown us unwavering support. Let us focus on the people who have proven their love and loyalty, rather than dwelling on the hurt caused by those who have chosen to prioritize superficial matters over family ties and who have decided not to have relationships with us.
Remember, disappointment may linger, but it does not define us. We are strong, resilient, and deserving of genuine connections. Let us surround ourselves with those who lift us up, appreciate us for who we are, and never let toxic relationships cloud our judgment.
Above all, let us learn from our experiences and those of others and strive to be the kind of family member who values love, compassion, communication, and empathy above all else. Together, we can break the cycle of disappointment and build a stronger, more supportive family network.
“May the work you do be a reflection of the passion inside you.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Sometimes you have to let go to move on.
You cannot swim for new horizons until you have courage to lose sight of the shore.”
– William Faulkner
Photo by David Boca on Unsplash
May your faith be unwavering, your determination unyielding, and your dreams unstoppable.
As you read in Sad Sometimes, I get sad sometimes. Today is one of those days. I am missing my sister, my gram, and my dad. And sometimes it just really sucks. As you know, I try to write uplifting, inspiring posts, and I try to be strong. But sometimes I need to let my guard down and be vulnerable.
May is a tough month for our family. In 2012, we lost my dad on the night of May 22 and in 2018 we lost my sister on May 7. Therefore, this month can be difficult, especially for my mother who misses a piece of herself on Mother’s Day.
Death is tough. You want to convince yourself that it is good because the person you love is no longer in pain, especially if they have been fighting a terminal illness. And yes, death is amazing for the person who has died because they have moved on to eternal life. They are enjoying all the glory of God and in the best and most peaceful place ever.
But here we are down here. Missing them. Suffering. Making ourselves miserable. Why? I think it is because we feel guilty for one reason or another. We are sad that we didn’t get a chance to tell our person one more thing. Or maybe we feel guilty because we feel we should have spent more time with them. Or maybe we feel guilty because we hadn’t talked to that person in a long time. Whatever it is we need to STOP. We cannot keep living with guilt. We made the best decisions for ourselves at the time with the information we had. We did not know our person would be gone. And even if we did, we did what we felt we needed to do with the time we had left.
I can almost guarantee that the person in Heaven is not holding a grudge against you. They are not worried one bit about how much time you did or didn’t spend with them because they know when your time comes you will be spending eternity together. And they are not upset about words that were spoken. So give yourself some grace. Let the guilt go. Your person does not want you down here being miserable or making others miserable. What they want for you is to live your life to the fullest. They want you to find someone to share life with. They want you to be happy and share happiness with others. They want you to honor them by sharing the amazing times you had and being happy.
Some days it is hard and some days it’s ok to be missing them. But let’s quit feeling sorry for ourselves and let’s be happy. Life is way too short to dwell on unhappy times. It’s also too short to try to control situations and people that we cannot.
So, Dad, please know I am missing you more than anything today. I wish you were here to call when my tire light comes on or when the pilot light goes out. I wish you were here to help us with projects and come relax by the pool. We’d love to take you out on the boat. I know you would love it. But you are gone. Therefore, the only thing I can do is try to live a life that I can be proud of and that I feel would make you proud. I know you are watching over us and smiling down in your quiet way. I can picture your face and it brings me peace. (Can you believe I started to like playing golf after all those years of bitching about it!!?? I am hoping to beat mom in the upcoming PNA Tourney…don’t tell her :))
Life is too short, my friends, for pettiness and jealousy. We need to remember death is inevitable for all of us. Therefore, if today were your last day on Earth, can you go with no regrets? If not, then take steps to complete your tasks so you can go with a clean conscience. Maybe write a letter to someone you need to make peace with (even if you just put it in an envelope for them to find later). Maybe write a thank you note to someone who made a difference in your life. Maybe give someone a call and tell them you love them. Whatever it is, get it done because we never know when it will be our time.
Remember, we are only here for a short time. Live a life full of adventure, kindness, and happiness. And let’s spread joy to one another. If you are missing someone take a moment to say hello and look for those Signs from Heaven. Hopefully, that will make you smile.